me n you.

2007-11-28T00:12:00.000+08:00

2007-10-28T23:14:00.001+08:00

BLOG UNDER CONSTRUCTION.

2007-10-20T20:05:00.000+08:00

ok. her request. so i'm here to blog again. alright many things are happenning lately.
mainly jus two things. studies and i'm sorry to hear abt what happened darling.
are you the one... that god has made for me? are you the one? NOOOOOOOO!!!
I SAY NOOOOOOOOOOO AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! LOL TALKING TO HER ON
THE PHONE. GOT WHAT TYPE WHAT. its so bored... studies. sigh have i really
sat down and studied in my entire life? fuck.. whats this. no i'm not gona fail.
STOP THE FUCKING CAR! listen to this song ppl. its nice. by circa survive.
lol she ate so much again. hahahahaa. du guay soon gauy rice guay.. you ang gu guay!
hahahaha, prawn noodle and small baby abalone. haha. i CAN cope with my studies.
I'M MK, I CAN I CAN I CAN I CAN I CAN. FUCK YEAH I CAN. BUT I FLOPPED
MY SCIENCE PRATICAL KANINABEH CHAOCHEEEBYE. I'M SO SAD...
ZINC CARBONATE. FCUK YOU. PHY DRAW UNTIL NO TIME TO EVEN DO OTHER
QUESTIONS. I MUST BE A FUCKING SLOW POKE. PUI. using knife to stab myself
in the back. damn. i hate this feeling. its like i'm so not serious with o level and it seems
to be unimportant to me. i dun have the wan chiong feeling. wtf. why why why whywhy!!
OH JESUS CHRIST SATAN ANTON LAVEY MOTHER MARY CAN U GIMME SOME
POWER SURGE AND MAKE MY BRAIN HAVE A SUDDEN OUTRAGE TO PUSH
MYSELF TO STUDY? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! IT ISNT TOO LATE.. COME ON!
FCUKING BODY WORK WORK WORK WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sigh. i must be crazy.
GERI DUN KEEP QUIET ON THE PHONE LAH. HAHAHA. EDIT WHAT PIC SO LONG.
LMAO. SIAN SIAN SIAN. AFTER BATHING MUST GO STUDY LERH. NO COM.
ANYONE NEED TO LEND COM? CAN BRING MY CPU HOME. LMAO! ok lah enuff of
this crap i'm typing. it'd be endless. GERI I'M HERE. I'M NOT A BANGLA INDIAN.
I'LL PROTECT YOU. WEEE. <3 TO ALL THE DOGS IN WGS. MUST YOU BE
SOMEONE ELSES DOG? HAHA. WOODLANDS SWIMMING COSTUME!

2007-10-10T00:20:00.000+08:00

hahaha. so here i'm again after so long. since when was the last time i blogged? this is a special request from her. haha. many things happened.. had my regrets.. i'm trying my very best to show her that i can change for her.. for us and give us another chance and reason to be tgt again.. this time i'll not let go.. i told myself this and i promised her too.. but of cos.. words cant really mean a thing.. believe or not.. so i'm going to have to prove it.. yeah.. i definitely will.. where can i ever find another girl like her.. i doubt so there will be another.. everyone gives a different feeling.. and she left me one so deep that i can never away erase and forget.. not in a million years.. i love her so much.. i dare to say.. i still do.. i'll always do.. my tempers real bad.. its the cause of everything.. if only i can change it.. become more calm and have a positive mind.. not acting foolish and blasting every word at her and making her all sad.. we've been quarreling after we broke up.. yeah i've been jealous.. everything we said.. i jus cant forget.. i still need her.. i cant deny that.. and i'm afraid of losing her again.. now everything i do.. i put her before myself.. she'll always be as important to me.. i want her to be mine and only mine.. lol.. if thats possible i'll always want her to be mine.. i'll stay faithful this time.. i learn from my mistakes.. my very very bad and unforgivable mistakes.. thanks laopo.. u gave me another hope.. and i know this is my final chance.. if i mess up again its over for us no matter how much and strong our love is.. it'll really be the last of gerimk.. so this time i'm definitely not gona lose this chance of a lifetime.. why not have a perfect life cos we only have one chance to live.. love the most perfect girl.. treat her ur best.. and hoppe she'll treat me back the best too.. make her special.. have no regrets with her.. at least when we make no mistakes in life.. we die a peaceful death.. isnt that better.. and we still have a happy family to continue.. i'm not all acting positive and stuff.. i jus wana be positive this time.. i cant be stuck and be like the past ever again.. she''ll be even more sad i guess.. dun wan her to think that its not worth it to get back with me.. i wana make things worthwhile this time.. everything i say.. i jus want u to know i'm sincere in getting u back.. i'm sincere to do everything for u.. u made me realize how blind i was.. when the one that needed me the most was u and i wasnt there for u.. i'm so sorry.. i'd really like to love a girl who needs me so much.. yet i let u cry alone.. sorry baby.. i love you dearly.. gimme sometime.. i believe after my o levels i can concentrate everything on us and controlling my temper.. healthy body healthy mind haha.. really wan to have a chalet with her want to let her be happy this time.. i wana be the one to make her happy. yeah i still do.. theres so much i wana do for her. theres still so much that we havent done tgt.. we need alot of catching and and even the stuff i promised u before still counts alright.. i still wana sit cable car with u de neh.. hahahaha... oh geri.. i love you i love you so much.. i wont let time destroy us.. i wana be the one who will take all ur sorrows away.. i'll quit smoking just for u.. i'm smoking lesser alrdy.. gimme some time ok.. i've got addicted.. so its alil tough.. i still can endure for 1 week not touching.. gimme sometime and i'll stop totally alrdy alright.. yeah gona meet her soon.. i'm so happy.. now its only o levels left to ponder.. its soon and i'm like.. only knowing 65 percent of my work.. gotta buck up.. studying everyday.. but also still play com everyday.. damn.. i'm gona study tmr too.. as i promised her i must get into a poly.. i must study hard.. if not she also dun wan me lerh.. now i wont want that to happen do i? OF COS NOT.. I'M AFRAID TO LOSE HER AGAIN!!! i miss everything.. everything we shared everything we had.. i wont let it all jus go down to waste.. this is the real test.. it all comes down to this.. i'll make u trust me again.. i'll change this stupid thinking and stuff like that.. alot of changing to do from my part.. on ur part.. i jus hope.. u'll feel me more alright.. dun stop bothering abt me.. dun scold so much vulgarities lah.. i also nvr scold so much.. haha.. worst than me alrdy.. ok i'm so tired now.. see u soon my dearest.. muack. hug. goodnight. kit<3yan.

2007-08-12T12:52:00.000+08:00

hello! im mingkit. haha.
talking to geri on the phone now.
geri's having her prelim tmr.
and she haven studied. lol.
blog again. (:
-geri here. lmao.

2007-08-09T05:53:00.000+08:00

many things happened. gona save the details. jus she know and i know thats enough? alright so everyone has lost faith and doesnt trust me. lost a couple of friends. making her change her lifestyle. hopefully. someday. just forget me. everyone is also saying just forget me. isnt it? if i could explain things properly maybe you wouldn be so bad then. got back the ring. she still misses me. though i miss her. but everything seems lesser now. ton out today with friends. danny long jie mervyn boon han. feels great to enjoy. the whole night i kept thinnkking abt stuffs that happened. apart of me says dun drag. cos giving her false hope isnt gonna get things anywhere. but i dun want to be harsh either. apart of me still wants to stand by her and stay with her. i duno what i want. what should i answer yyou darling? keeping quiet isnt an option yes i know that. but its hard to even think of something that will not hurt you. i know my silence is killing you slowly as we go on. just like you said. i know everything to get things back. i know what ur thinking. i know what you want. what happened in the lift jus now when i sent you home. its been a long time since we kissed. everyone sees me as an asshole now. i cant bother abt what they think. tired alrdy. i still feel its the worst and cheapo reason to break up. its the lamest i guess. sorry i couldn find the words to say. sorry i couldn explain myself. i wished i could do something to make you feel not so bad. but i think its not what my brain wants me to do. although my heart aches still when i hear you msg chim and stuffs like you seen him and i still get so worried for you when u go out alone and wonder alone in the middle of the night. but i told myself. thats jus the way it should be after we broken up. i knew you were trying to create chances to let me have a chance to patch with you and not keep quiet cos it didnt solved anything. you got lots to tell me but now seems like theres many things you will hide from me alrdy. besties we'll be. i hope to take a step back this time. today. i drank two bottle of jim beam cola. didn got drunk. no kick at all. maybe too much gas. cos theres coke. i did smoke. so sorry everyone. to stella if u see this yeah maybe you'll hate me. to kc and ds. to geri. i love you. my memories of us and u will always remain in my heart. i'm not the guy thats gona commit. those who thought i was one in the past. a guy who can hardly be found. the kind who can be devoted. i did asked myself. am i? lol.. get used to the me right now. if u cant dun let me be a heartache to everyone of u that has ever cared for me. oh whats the point of saying this. u'll just heck care me or even wan wack me up bah. when i'm at a point out of reach from you guys maybe u guys should leave me alone alrdy. i duno what i'm doing anymore. out of the blue. things jus happened. i'm not sure now. if i said. i could have prevented all this. because. i really dunnno. if all this can really be prevented. it happened in a matter of days. 3days? 4? a week? sigh. i cant turn back the time. those who want to hate me hate me. those who jus wana spread some stuff abt me behind my back i couldn careless anymore. things came with a consequence. i'll face it. cos i did it alrdy. its too late. to gain back everyones trust. thats how i feel. i'm avoiding. i'm hiding. becoming like a stupid idiot now. lost my sense of direction? my hearts so cold. i cant even feel who i'm anymore. (: when was that moment i'm truely happy? when was it that i was so sad? i only could rmb.... when was it that i was jealous. when was it that i was filled with hatred. it all ended when i broke my fingers.. i knew i cant continue anymore. its not ur fault. dun ever blame urself. everyone can put the blame on me. please thank you. its all numb.. maybe when i died. i will be able to ffeel.. the true happiness. at this point.. i dun treasure my life anymore.

2007-07-02T20:10:00.000+08:00

blahblahblah. boring.. feeling so moody these few days due to the medication...
making me all so giddy and slpy the whole day.. must catch up on my studies.
been studying an hour a day better than nth. lmfao. but i really put my mind in.
yeah so with my master hand becoming my useless hand i can only do everything
with my left hand. pathetic... damn.. i feel so sad.. when the doctor said those
words to me this morning.. so yeah.. i guess i wont be as fit anymore.. sigh..
i wont even be able to recover fully even if i had a hundred years to live.. sucks..
now i need to be a left hander wtf.. well.. thanks for those who cared.. especially..
geri. haha. yeah and she's been encouraging me to study and sending me msg
to keep me going everyday.. yeah its not so bad.. i love her company.. thanks
darling. love ya. XD finally i'm able to meet you tmr to go sch. even though i
have 7 days of mc.. i'm fcuking unfit for anything.. cant even fcuking run..
i think she's coming home now.. waiting for her phone call. oh i miss her so much.
all this has happened i wont say that its good or bad.. neither regretful or not..
cos i dont really know.. but obviousdly its bad.. just hope by o level i'll be able to
use my left hand like my master hand lawl.. don't blame urself baby.. its not ur
fault.. was it my fault? haha. maybe i was jus too hiong alrdy.. anyways lets just
forget abt it and concentrate on our studies.. i cant believe but i'm finally worried
abt my o levels lawl. cool! been reading up on chemistry for the past 2 days..
havent been picking up a pen for 5 days now.. tmr i'm gona start from scratch at
sch.. in order to train my left hand i'll have to write abc to Z and 123 again...
until i get the hang of it. haha. i'm not gona give up! as long as ur there for me!
<3fangpicong (:XD

2007-06-30T09:58:00.000+08:00

meaningless, some would say. i'm stupid, most would say. but she said........
i just want to kan kai. isolate myself. i'm just another ridiculous nonsense to her.(:

2007-06-24T15:25:00.000+08:00

ytd went to celebrate her birthday. i messed it up. twice in a row.
everyones nagging wtf. got no right to even tell her to do stuff.
now i get it. everything is my fault. after she told me all the stuff
on msn. i can tell what she thinks of me. tats jus too bad for me.
haha. maybe i should change and become those hum ji boy.
who gets controlled by gf and do whatever she says. maybe she likes
that. cos i feel like if i'm like this hum ji den all this wouldn happen.
i'm gona give in all the way. if she reads this i guess she'll jus get all
angry. i feel so heartbroken. i'm all to blame all i needed was to
forget abt what i see. dun even bother the nxt time if can i'd jus
hey tell her what happened and i'll jus laugh and be cool and tell myself.
nth ever happened! its not on purpose. why should i even get
angry. damn i'm so stupid. I'M SORRY GERI.

2007-06-19T11:03:00.000+08:00

ytd geri came my house. went to fetch her in the morning lol.
so like.. she wanted to swim. and i brought her to chinese garden.
didn know it was closed for renovations. law. she was like abit angry.
hahahaha. den we went for breakfast at the coffee diam there. shes
so cute. haha. the food was not bad. the fried fish bee hoon totally
sucked. she was so tired and slpy by the time we ate finish. went home
directly. she came my house to slp and used com. her coms fixed now.
mum bought lunch. sort of. lol. and we ate. left my house at 315pm
for marsiling to get her sony ericsson walkman earpiece. lawl. nice bass.
after buying the sky was grey and was abt to rain. we went to yio chu
kang swimming complex as she wanted to swim still. swim awhile and
left the place. it was raining alrdy when we went out of the compound.
bought cup noodle called sl and talk to her. we went to civics and ate
lerk thai. sorry got your mum angry. didn bring u home early. so like we
ate one sticky rice mango. and one yum hoon sen. lawl. we took a bus back
home and in the bus she kept making fun of me. tickling me and put her
freezing cold hands on my neck. i hate that man. lawl. crap. she was hyper.
yeah and i'm happy. (: alright so after i sent her home i went to meet my cousin.
i took a train from atmiralty to cck and met him to my house. went to jurong
point to get some stuff and back home to have our dinner. after awhile he
went out to meet his girl friend. haha. so like i stayed at home and play game
wait for him come back. i slpt and 5 am. woo. waited for her to wake up.
yeah so like i msg her a goodnight msg which was kinda long. haha. yeah cos i
missed her. den i went to slp alrdy. and me and my cousin are talking now.
ok blog again some other time. lawl when she complains. XD

2007-06-03T01:06:00.000+08:00

so. its a boring day. friday went out with laopo to orchard to meet her friend.
went wisma starbucks? or was it coffee bean.. ordered drinks and i sat down
reading a story book titled for one more day. i dun quite rmb the title but its
a nice book to read. yeah teaches alot of things in life. i guess theres more to
our relationship too. yeah preperations has to be made. many things gotta
take care of. so much to study. so much to think abt. so much to tell her.
so much to do for her. time is so short. days are getting shorter. holidays
seem like jus 24hours divided by one month. passes so quickly. i miss her.
i've hurt her. unknowingly i have. i didn take the initiative. i suck this time
not a good bf to her. i could tell the way she msges shes almost speechless.
i wanna change for her. i really wanna. yes parents alike i've shouted at them.
telling myself they suck and stuff. feeling so down i duno what to say to them.
she's different. she's my partner. my other happiness. my escape. i suppose.
my understanding. i didn share my sadness with her.. rather all i did was jus
caused more ppl to be sad.. more ppl i loved around me to be sad.. wat can i do.
i find no meaning to all this. jus lost. whats going on. if i could change for her.
of cos at home with my parents i'd change towards them too. my attitude.
my temper. i seriously suck. i'm trying so hard. it isnt easy. i couldn for 1 sec
put a sentence in my mind telling myself rmb dun shout dun get angry. how.
how am i able to do that. i'd think abt it tonight. before i slp. mums sad.
grandmas old. she doesnt wana care. but everyday at home. theres so much
quarrels. my dad is so sad. but why dun i feel for him. whats happenened to me.
i feel like an animal. i wasnt like this. when did i became like this. i knew.when.
i knew how. i've let myself turn into something else and thought i'd be ok.
yes i'm ok. but the ppl around me are not ok. i'm sorry. i'm so sorry... tats all
i can say for now.. i'll change for you for them. for those who cared and knew..
give me somemore time.. i promise.. i really promise. i need u geri. i need u to
be here. i need ur support. i noe u've suffered.. i noe u've cried.. many times u
did. at night. my heart is all that i can give u now.. my words are all i have to
assure u. my actions are inconsistent cos i couldn control it yet. i'll bear in mind..
what i tell u. pls rmb. i really mean it. dun be sad. trust me. i love you. my eyes
are tired. i'm so sleepy now.. i wished i could hug u.. tell u its gonna be ok..
baby. good night. rest well. i'd see u soon ok. be my pillar of strength. (:

2007-05-31T09:43:00.000+08:00

hello. i've been so lazy to blk. now since i have time i jus blog something. (:
so. had a lousy dreamt last night and woke up at 6.50am. go msg her.
sun was coming up alrdy. went toilet and back to com to check if my game
sever was up. it wasnt. so went back to lie on the bed and slp. until now.
9.30am woke up. toilet again. stilll sick. still have blk nose. wonder whats
the medicine for. they gave one for running nose. which i dun have. lol.
cheat my money la. that amatuer doctor. i havent been seeing her for
the past 2 days. only seen her blog pictures and talking to her on the phone.
these few days she always came home late. den everytime talk abit i also
slpy wan slp lerh. for the past like one month she keep slping late. even till now.
holiday still slp late wake up early. where got beauty slp at all lor. still dare say.
haha. must slp early wake up late. not the other way around. damn theres
so much phlegm in my throat i cant get it out. bored lah.. nth to do now..
wonder if she had wake up alrdy anot. she always wake up very early one.
die.. this month phone bill going to get scolding again. but nvm. haha. dun care.
i now why i these days so bored. cos i didn spend time with her. lol. then become.
stay at home play game. she says one week only go out twice. means i cant see
her for 6 days. since one day she'll with me and the other duno with who.
nxt year i go poly i wonder hows it gonna be. i'll surely after sch go find her have
lunch or dinner. haha. that would be nice. how strong is our love. i guess we'll only
noe. after we both are seperate and having not much time with each other.
if got someone better i also bo bian. hahaha. see you soon geri. <3

2007-05-28T20:42:00.000+08:00

Yawn.. i'm so tired. feeling slpy cos of the medicine. been sick for a week.
had a slight fever on and off. blocked nose and running nose. cough.. zzz
kept coughing non stop. like wan tio tb. lmao. damn itchy lah my throat.
make me so kang kor. dun even noe how i got it. should be from the
gastric pain the other time den slowly became fever and now.. theres even
a damn big ulcer on my lower lip near my gum. wtf. so painful. i dun dare
put salt on it lah. i think tats sick. den so salty and painful. rather put bonjela.
for ulcers. lol. taste nicer. today woke up at 5am. cos my alarm went off.
i forgot to off. sian. so damn tired. den after woke up i cant get back to slp.
kept coughin and nose blk all. cant breathe properly. blew my nose for almost
an hour. by the time alrdy 6 plus. so i jus used com dota den went t play ps2.
bored lah. and 9.30 lidat she reached my house. yay! thanks laopo for coming
early. haha. i miss you all night. past few days keep quarreling i'll try to make
things fine now. concentrate on our studies lerh. u dun use too much com lah.
i also wont use. even if i o lvl ur n lvl also equally important mah. how can i not
worry for u too. i worried since last year. make my worries go away narh.
den at least i can put my mind at ease. (: alright so left my house at 12 plus.
took train to bugis as she wanted to get her bangle and necklace. shop shop.
and in the end she bought her necklace and bangle. hope she like it lah. lol.
cos girls jus keep wanting more and more! lmao. sian. i'm trying so hard to save
money for my psp. i hope by the time my birthday comes i can at least have more
than 300$. den the rest will ask my parents to fork out lmao. still got motherboard.
skinny jeans and more tshirts. so much i wan buy sial. wan faster o lvl finish den
my daddy will buy me a laptop. will study hard alrdy. tuition will be as usual.
seems like no rest. but i still got play dota. gotta cut down. darling u too. dun use
com so much. call me if ur bored lah. lol. i'll try to entertain you since i like to talk
to you so much! LMAO. i love u baby. hope to make things work out perfectly fine.
even if theres problems i'll still wan you to be the one beside me solving it tgt with me.
MUACK. LOL.

2007-05-26T09:05:00.000+08:00

isolation could be the best way.. maybe den she'll be much happier.. if explaining to someone you love doesn't seem t come t a point of understanding, den stop. cos there isnt really much of a choice anymore. someone has to keep quiet. someone has to sacrifice. why not me.. most of the time its jus me..... alone..

2007-05-24T19:20:00.000+08:00

sigh. shes scared i could tell. maybe shes doing her stuff.
but the thing still runs in her thoughts. what have i done.
i'll stand by her. i miss her so much. tml can see her lerh.
maybe she'll be happy to see me too? maybe not? hais.
i jus played a game of dota. i'm getting ready to slp.
would she call me at 10pm like she used to? i wonder..
shes speechless. too worried too scared. but i noe.
after we noe the answer the nxt step it'll be easy for us
to handle. i hope so god pls hear my plea. dat nth
of that sort would place on us. its too big for us to cope.
in my heart i wan jus let her rest. calm down her heart
and her soul. dun let her mind run wild. that would be
ok for now. this whole month is jus madness for us.
its me who needs some changing. i guess she had always
listened to me. its jus me who hasnt been treating her right.
didnt went sch today. had gastric and fever. now i'm feverish.
hope tml will recover so can accompany her to shopping. (:
i'd be happy if i could jus be there wherever you may go.
if u let me. if u asked me to. maybe show signs. tell me something.
baby. if theres ever anything i wanted on earth right now.
its a confirmation and an assurance for us. so we can put
this relationship aside and dun worry at all that either would
leave each other. as time passes by. i found out somethings
tat i had nvr seen when being with u. i didn noe. u needed me.
i didn noe u didn wan me to be lonely. although i'm used to
being lonely. jus that now there's someone there for me to miss.
love. both good and bad. too much bad lately. so sorry.. i'll try
my best. to watch the way i speak to parents and to you.
you've been asking me to talk to them nicely all the time on the phne.
yeah i did today. i didn shout. i didn pissed off. when dad talked.
i felt fine. i'm trying hard to change. yes. for you. i hope this time
i can succeed. slp early darling. i love you. good night.

2007-05-19T21:54:00.000+08:00

Back to blog as i promised. tired, sad. she doesnt trust me anymore.
i loved her so much. i still do. i miss her. wished she would reply.
call me even. how nice. i'd be really happy. dun think so much darling.
keep it tgt. like i wana keep us tgt. duno wats happened now. dun
wish to know too. haha. think she also. tired to think lerh ba.
rest well darling. i wana cuddle u so tight. ur nvr gona leave my sight.
i love u. ytd went to stay over at my cousin house. we drank and talked.
abt many things. so long din see them i kinda like miss them.
saw troy. he has grown so big now. keep running around. reached their
place around 1030pm. played with troy abit let him smell me and lick
my leg. haha. so ticklish. den went to sean room and started to talk.
drank some low alcohol content stuff. me and sean went downstairs
near the pond to drink. den talked. i saw a black thing flashed pass real
quickly. didn bother jus drank and joked. talked abt many stufff.
whole night i kept thinking abt her. when i drank i thought abt those calls
we made on the way. i could tell she was different. damn i miss her so much.
she's still angry maybe. but i hope she'll go to slp soon. and not always
slp so late. i'll be worried for u laopo. slpt around 5am. woke up at 10.
saw her morning msg. i was really happy. wanted to reply straight away.
uncle bought prata. den went to wash face and eat. called her after tat.
shes sad and i caused it. now she hates and tells me its over. sigh.....
i wished there was room for talk. hope she will feel better tml. pls god.
i beg u almighty jesus i wished u'd answer to my callings. baby come back t me....

2007-04-16T20:26:00.000+08:00

oh i'm so exhausted with sch. i wana catch up but i feel so bored and tired.
how sial. what am i gona do to pick up the form to study like last year again.
jus feel like giving up. someone push me pls. haha. i cant even hlp myself now.
lol. funny lah. i talk so much den nvr do. zz sian of homework too. havent
been doing my math homework since january. who can beat that man.
not trying to boast lah.. duno why i this year so heavy. maybe i know.
maybe theres a reason. i jus dun feel like changing. argh forget it.
lazy to think. gona dota! 1 round den wait for her call and do my history.
failed my ca1 got over 30 points. wow. ca2 gona fail again. sigh. worst.
this year is so jialat i cant seem to concentrate. been working out again.
see classmate all go gym den i also no time for gym so stay at home train.
jus now went with her to sun plaza ate lunch and get her stuffs. walked around
chit chat and laughed all day. i'm happy lah. that i got someone to make me
happy and cheerful. haha. but nxt year how. gona seperate cos i going poly.
eh dun even noe even if i'd be able to make it to poly lmfao. but i hope i can.
though we may be at different locations but our hearts doesnt change that
easily. like u said we gotta trust. no matter what. yes i trust. i wana love u
always if i could. my heart grows old with ur warmth tgt with it i'll die in peace.

2007-04-11T18:24:00.000+08:00

wow! how long has it been man. haha. like so long didn blog.
or should i say really damn fcuking long. lols. bored lahs..
jus lazy to blog and like got so much to blog den tired to
type it all out. now thats all over now. i wana start afresh
for everything. from studies to attitude. t the way i treat her.
i wana change. at least i'd really want to make a change.
i wan her to be happy. yeah. sometimes we're jus quarreling.
but we'd be fine after talking nicely and giving in. i got
too frustrated and stress most of the time over what she said
and i jus blew up. damn sorry. damn regret. darling i miss you.
ha. been like years havent seen u. but actually its jus two days.
ytd first time went inside her house. haha. i was so scared her
dad will wake up and saw me. what am i gona do abt that. lols.
every noise that i hear i'd run one side to hide. aha. so like
i didn went sch ytd cos sian. and been many misunderstandings
small tiffs here and there. sometimes jus stuck at a dead end.
i duno what to do anymore. but luckily we somehow manage to get
to normal again. i duno abt her. but i hope we are better. i'm
not thinking so much lately. maybe being tired and stressed from
every other thing.like so difficult to handle. wonder if i gona
fail my o levels. sigh. need pay the fees lerh. whatever am i
gonna do. i think tml i come home gona tell my grandma to lend me
money first. jus worried tat dad couldn come up with the money.
grandpa's still overseas. cant get money from him either. hais.
haha. today celebrated kc birthday in sch so fun! morning i was like
kpkb him. disturb here and there. den first recess all gather.
sing birthday song and cut cake for him. haha. how nice. so many ppl
celebrate. i also nvr lidat before. haha. den... took picture of
him and sl cutting cake. haha they both so ps. she was like holding
onto his hand when cutting the cake. den after sch another cake.
we ate some and the rest we jus flung it at the birthday boy and
rub it all over his shirt and face. later on we used chocolate fudge
and pour on him and the rest was like aim larris aim larris lol.
den we all also tio on our shirts. most of the boys was damn dirty
haha. argh fcuking mosquitoes keep biting me in my room. i'm so bored.
waiting for her to call me. miss her lah. hope she'ss get well real
soon and come to sch tml so i can see her and spend time with her.
we havent been having must time tgt lately. cos everything changed.
like nowadays we keep reminding each other to studies. i feel like
i'm getting even more lazier than her alrdy. lol. at least she noes
her work. did asked her to keep studying now i dun care if quarrel or
fan her liao. jus keep telling and telling. haha. but i myself keep
slacking and slacking. die liao. gotta study now. if not my o's sure
jialat. alright gona go eat my dinner now! darn hungry and jus finished
tuition lol. die lah chem test tml. what the fcuk fail lerh lah. zzzz
i still haven get chem text book lah. lmao my tuition teacher also say me
ping shi bu shang xiang, ling shi bao fuo jiao. HAHA. I MISS U GERI!
HERES WHAT U REQUESTED IN UR POST! HAHA. LOVE YOU BABAY!

2007-02-25T10:35:00.000+08:00

ytd was a fun time with her. morning woke up straight
go bath and was face den went to aunties house. bai nian.
reached there abt 10mins den my cousins reached. was quite
boring narh. had some sushi and some food. plus curry chicken.
den sat down and chit chat with my cousins. so long nvr see
them liao, so happy to see them lar. they left first and later
on my parents and i left too. so i went to meet her at atmiralty
up stairs the lift. after we met and boarded the train, we headed
to orchard as she wanted to go taka buy slippers but dun have le.
met alicia zack and sl there. we left very quickly to city hall.
so went inside flash and splash look for clothes but all like
no habb my size leh. only L and very little s and m. i was abit
disappointed lah. she said my shirt looked like i shit on it. lmao.
so after tat i really wanted to get another shirt llur. anyway. i
so long nvr shop for shirts. so went thru 3 types of brand.
reef, volcom and rip curl. ha. stayed there very long. sorry darling.
llike forgot the time hah. and ended up no time to shop for her stuff.
okay on the way to marina i opened all my ang bao and use up all.
lols. we ate at pizza hut for dinner. so nice lah. after eating we
were both darn darn full. den ate dao lai also so late lerh. so we
gotta run here and ther to see more clothes lol. cos she'll be late
t meet her family. and we confirmed that the slippers she wanted from
m)phosis is coming back after the sales. haha. wat a relieve. if not
she'll be sad again. cos lately what we want find also cant find.
hoped she liked the meal. lols. it was quite ex. but worth it lah.
only scared nxt week no money nia. hha. muack. love u laopo.
i've tried everything. its so difficult not to think. when things
and moments get better each time each day. would there be a day
when i'll jus lose everything? lol. sian. i miss u by the day.
i think i should change myself. sigh.. its sad.. things are jus sad..

2007-02-19T10:14:00.000+08:00

HAPPY CNY EVERYONE! mines been boring.. how abt u guys?
sigh.. things changed pretty quickly.. and i've been
quiet lately.. whether at home or outside with relatives.
maybe tats abt it to blog.. nth to upload.. going t brush
teeth and bath den eat soon. lol.. hais.. the only one
tats happy now.. is u.. and nvr me.. cos i dun need it
t be like this.. cos i dun seek for anything.. i jus wan
i jus wan... i've got much t say... but i guess she wouldn
understand.. no one will... enjoy... bestie.. (:

2007-02-17T11:29:00.000+08:00

schhool. on fri was kinda sian. had geo test in the morning.
later on headed for recess and went to hall for cny concert.
fooled around. but i was kinda sian lah. cos cant go sit with
her. ha. den think of stuff. so. she went home and changed.
and headed to my house. took train and bus. grandma was home.
she took darn alot of photos with my phone. not gona post.
very lazy. go her blog see. so like left the house at 5 plus.
due to some things that got in the way. haha. her stomachache.
we went cwp and saw kc and ds. chat for awhile and they made
fun of her. so like after tat went vista to have dinner.
at banquet had chicken rice. not bad lah. nice. and drank bandung.
left quickly after that. and sat downstairs her house. and we
sang song tgt. lmao. talked and laughed. den she went upstairs.
thanks for straightening my hair laopo! haha. but i still haven
cut my hair.. zzz. after sent her home . met up with danny, wesley
and boon han. played bb at 888 there. after like 1 hour den went
danny house. sent her pic. and talked with her on the phone.
i was darn slpy. lol. so talked and slpt. she also slp with me.
this morning went to get breakfast for her at mac and brought
it up t her house gave her and muack. i went home. yawn.. sian la.
reunion dinner no ppl come stil called reunion dinner meh...
its gona be a damn damn boring CNY. sigh.. i miss geri..

2007-02-13T19:27:00.000+08:00

i miss you i miss you.... where'd u go.. sigh...
my cheerful happy smiling baby.. has she hide away now?
why has it gotta be such a big ttwist. its my fate
to be with u. now. maybe jus now. maybe nxt time too.
i don't wanna noe the outcome. i jus wanna be with u
right now. i'm so into u. i wished i could jus drown
myself in vodka and jim beam every night till its all
fine and over with. i love drinking..cos u allow me to
i hate smoking. cos u hate smoking.. its as simple as tat.
i hate fighting.. cos u dun allow me to.. i wana turn real
bad.. but ur always around to stop and prevent me..
i love ur sudden appearance. i want tat sweet love of urs
always around me. got me melted. made me fall soundly aslp.
what happened. what ever happened. its real bad now. u
were such a great pretender.. i thought everything was fine.
this morning. i didn realised. until cia and sl told me.
i wasnt an attentive bf. sigh. sorry bout dat. hearing from
the way u put it its really bad isnt it?? whats going on
in ur head right now. who hav u turned to? it isnt me this
time. i noe u need time for urself. ytd i jus told myself
t give u time let u be alone. so i didn looked out if there
was anything wrong. i jus thought u needed them and me
getting jealous all the time i'm tryin to change right now.
today. we didn quarrel. i didn talk much neither. seems
like i cant find things to talk abt with u now. u've gotten
more pekcek and easily agitated lately. i;m watching every
step. i'm seeing u change. watching u becoming worst each
day. controlling tolerating everything and jus keep it all
t urself. at home theres quarrels. at school theres problems..
and theres even more coming from in ur mind. baby..
I DUN WANT TO LEAVE YOU PLS BE OK SOON. I'D BE WAITINGG. (:
HOW NICE IF U COULD JUS LET ME STAY BY UR SIDE. SUPPORTING.
JUS WATCHING IS ENOUGH. MUACK.

Dear Valentine,
loving u wasnt really tat tough at all.
its not gona be easy. i can see that.
whenever ur quiet i'd worried silently.
its such a crucial moment now. get urself
right ok. hang on tight. get a grip.
i dun noe wat it is now. cos ur not saying.
its not a matter of guessing alrdy. maybe..
jus maybe someday.. u'd tell me. everything.
but for now. i'll jus be here. till ur better.
i'll try t understand and wont bring much
mafan to u ok. no quarrels dun worry. its stupid.
i shouldn be feeling wat i'm not suppose t.
haha. only u noe wat i'm meaning yeah. ^^
cheers laopo. valentines day tml. i've got nth
for u apparently. everyone must be thinkin i'm
crazy or pro or watever. for not giving my gf
anything. maybe u'd be expecting something but
t tell the truth i've got nth up my sleeves this
time aha. i've only got my heart for u t keep.
as long as u want it t stay. is tat a good enuff
valentines day gift? dun really noe. :) can u feel
my love burning for u? its true love. ur jus the
only girl tat i had dedicate everything t. muack.
will give u my very best alright. GO GERI!! HEHE.

YOURS SINCERELY,
K.M.K. lmao.

2007-02-11T10:52:00.000+08:00

ytd, on the 10/2 whole upper sec had cip.. tired..
teacher wan break record.. give us so many blocks to do..
was late to meet her in the morning.. my damn alarm didn
sound.. so she had to go meet the rest on her own.. sorry..
how did it felt like when i wasnt there to walk with you??
sigh.. cip ended at 2 plus. but i left at 1.35. cos i want
to send her home. dun wan her to go home alone.. happy tat
i saw her.. so like she went home to bath and change.. and i
went to 12 floor of her block to change.. we went cwp to
meet alicia and went town.. alighted at somerset.. went heeren
to have the pontian noodle.. i ordered the big one.. with extra
noodles.. elaine came jus after me and geri ordered.. den
cia ordered follwed by elaine.. after eating wernt to take
neoprint and the machine was cocked up.. the pictures.. didn
turn out right.. den we walked around heeren and later on went
to taka.. me and her.. left from there.. went bishan to buy
mee sua and got sugercane drink too.. left immediately after tat..

i know.. i was so careless.. i felt i was useless.. eversince the
start of school.. we quarreled.. almost everyday.. most of the time
it was jus me.. made the you angry and fedup.. i guess its hard..
for the both of us.. but please.. i really wish to get it right..
when u said i had childish thinkings.. at taka.. i was jus anyhow
saying stuff.. i know in my heart.. what u meant.. i jus didn want
it to get into my mind.. those slpless nights.. we both had them..
we're happy when being tgt.. seeing each other.. inside us.. there's
a big big prob yet to be faced someday.. hope it isnt too soon..
things seemed so fine to everyone on the outside.. if only i wasnt
oversensitive all the time.. there's always someone much better
than me.. but i hope i could be the best in you.. you deserve much
better than me.. i miss you.. those memories i'd nvr wana lose..
ur my friend.. my bestie.. my gf.. the only one who ever tidied my
room for me.. nagged and scolded me and didn care if i had told u
i didn liked it.. made me listen.. i changed all becos of u..
i can always do everything when ur there.. i'm fighting everything..
everything to be with you.. i pushed myself in everyway possible..
those quarrels we had.. it didn really changed anything did it?
u seem so lost now.. dun noe wat to say to me.. is there anything
tat i should noe abt? maybe i was jus thinking too much.
i miss you so much right now.. wished it was so clear..

2007-02-04T16:27:00.000+08:00

she's under my jacket

muahahaha. bored bored arhs!!! yawn.. so slpy. slpt on mrt.
got one auntie tapped my hand den i woke up lols. jurong east.
was like so tired.. walked around like a zombie. waited for
boon lay train. finally reached home liao. switched on com.
not tired alrdy. she's aslp i guess. haha. i love her so much.
sat under her blk jus now with her. taking pics. stared at her
for awhile. thought in my mind. its so true. kept huggin her.
treasure everything. i'm so happy las. got someone to pei and
look forward in looking out for everyday. someone to worry abt
care abt. feels jus oh so GREAT! so alright. ytd was a sat.
she came my house and we kinda actually wanted to study.. but
ahha. didn lor. play play around and used com. dl songs put mp3.
btw ytd is 3/2/07 haha. and and before we came i went out around
10 to pick her up downstairs her house. woke up at 9 leh. so tired.
haha. but everytime i'll still make sure i pick her up downstairs
her house. currently eating guava. so soft one not nice. zz.
so ytd we talked alot. go to know shes fine at school. getting along
and getting used to her environment and ppl. of cos alil jealous
here and there. its like why am i not the one beside her... sigh..
but den ok lah. not so bad. at least shes mine. all mine!! LMAO.
we trained to my house. and she saw a pretty girl so she wanted to
follow. and both of ur didn notice we took wrong train lmao. den
too bad. and alighted at sembawang den i had kfc for my breakfast.
the vegs were yellow lmao. like so not fresh eh. wtf is tat.
still finished everything. den took train back to boon lay. mummy
called me say making the thai laksa. lol. different from the one
we both had the other time. luckily she like it too. even thinks its
better than the other one. phew. haha. thought she wont eat lur.
umm and she said i not xi xin. cos i'm super duper careless. sorry!
i'll be on alert nxt time. watever i do ok. promise. wan be the one
who protects u. too bad u wont let me fight. my temper need adjust.
i'll slowly change for u. [= u made me the happiest guy haha.
send her home around 5 plus. after she reached home around 6 plus -7,
i went to have dinner with danny. now we're like nth much to talk.
he quiet and i keep wan find things to talk. but also ended up jus
having our food and nth much to say to each other. how many years
friendship we had? since pri 2. abt 8 years. rmb many stuff we always
do tgt. lol. although now not so childish liao lah. but still good
friends right. i see u lidat. i also duno can do wat. everything u
say is duno duno duno. i also duno wat t say. ytd i drank. so i
abit gong. today forgot wat i say to u in the msg. if offend u in
anyway sorry ah. nxt time come my house ton again lah. dun smoke
so much lah. 1 packet 1 week. can liao. so waste money and time.
lol. anything u noe i will hlp lah. nowadays. i concentrate more
on geri and sch now.. not i nvr bother lah. bro. always will be.
take care ah hum noi noi. LMAO.
okay today . 4/2/07 woke up 8am and slacked on bed until 8.17am den
went to bath. den many stuff happened nur. den so sian. make me
late t meet her. made her quarrel with her mummy. very sorry laopo.
met her up for swimming but reached there jumped inside the pool she
complained very cold. swim also cold. lol. den like not more than 10
mins we both went to bath liao lmao. den after tat kept taking picture.
she kept insisting. maybe post it when she sends me. lmao. laopo post
for me can? LOL. had lunch with her in mac. den walked around cwp.
saw ron. wanted t wish him happy birthday den didn. ok so walked home
with her. today whole day kept laughing lol. she's damn cute. saw
someone's leg got mole den laugh until peng. cos got hair on it. zzz.
hha. saw her face i also laugh lmao. i miss her. will wait for her call
tonyte. alright blog again. some other day. cheers!

2007-01-29T20:23:00.000+08:00

27/1
went out with her to orchard. walk walk around t
search for her stuffs. went heeren to eat first.
had the ben zhen noodle. nice lah. lmao. later on
we walked walked around heeren looking for her
necklaces she wanted t buy gona get her 2. but..
due to money constraints i only can pay some for
the second one.. sigh.. after awhile she received
alicia's msg and she went to meet us at FEP. so like
3 of us walked walked around. i was quiet. maybe wat
sean told me was right.. but its over now.. so forget it.
shop halfway saw dexter and dyonna. i stood with dex
and chit chat with him for awhile told him i was sian
he said he also sian lol. we like in same situation.
later on queued up for tempura and saw jo and jun.
went t walk around again after that. alicia went off
first. and we walked awhile more and bought koko krunch
bbt. she liked it. so i was okay okay all the way. lol.
so we drank and walked around, searching for the second
necklace she wanted to buy. first one was bought at heeren.
so like went many places and still she couldn get one
she really liked. and i kept pestering her t choose faster.
cos i thought we could catch a movie or something.
but alrdy no time lerh. so i dropped the idea. haha. yeah.
finally managed to buy one las. after buying we went off le.
we took at train back t atmiralty. and on the way i kind
of offended 2 aunties lmao. keep banging into them cos i was
dancing and she kept tickling my funny bones. so i couldn
stop laughing. lols. its been so long i laugh until my
stomach cramp. yeah. so she's the first tat made me laughed
like a mad man again. lol. hope she'll be the last. [:
i love her lah. lately hu lu qu nao in sch. cos got jealous
and stuff. i noe lah cannot lidat. but sorry lur. guess i
couldn control much las. but thought abt it the whole day
if she happy den i also let her be and dun put my feelings in.
it'll go away also.. haha. sigh sian.. i wish she'll share
with me her burdens. u've been quiet lately. i understand lerh.
is jus being here for u enough? mentally and physically. i'll
always be around. but humans change.. i hope i was still the
one pulling her back.. but now im not anymore.. sigh..
laopo. ur not my burden. am i urs? i hope not. i can change
my temper. wont be so hot headed. everything also wan fight.
i'll listen t u everytime. when i couldn control i'll do
something stupid t let it all out. usually its jus wacking
and breaking some stuffs lol.. dun worry i'll slowly change.
i'll keep a look out for u. wont let ppl bully u. but things
u must tell me. dun wait until last minute. thinking abt it
makes me angry. seeing u cry makes me wana fight again..
i guess only u could control me.. when i see ur angry face.
i always think twice and stop everything that i'm doing..
sorry again alright.. i'm treasuring every moment of us tgt.
i hope things for u could get better soon. maybe soon u'll
be different.. but i tink i can blend in. i dun wana lose u.
certain things i'd nvr be able t understand. but i nvr stop
trying to. i jus wan be tat perfect one u ever needed right now.

2007-01-15T21:30:00.000+08:00

yawn... today so tired. slpt in class. didn actually
slpt lahs. but thought abt lots of stuff.. does she noe.
ha. alright met her around 6.38 am. she was earlier than
me tis time hahaha. wow. didn noe why. she's cold and
i didn brought jacket. so like hugged her. haha. dunc
think it really warmed her up lols. so.. went sch around 6.50.
met up with sl and cia. at vista. on the way t vista she had
stomach. lols. ok so walked t sch. whole day lessons boring.
played in chem lab. msged her whole day throughout. her phone
no batt. after sch she had netball training. so i went for
choice. after choice went outside play street soccer. woo.
been so long missed it so much its darn fun. got the wana
ping ming feeling. shiok arhs. lmao. felt darn tired at
first but run up and down long lerh jiu not tired ler. ha.
so suddenly around 5 plus she called me and it sounded like.
"Where Are You?!!?!" "i injured my my leg i gotta go home now"
"i called mummy" "going to see chinese physician." so i stopped.
my soccer and ran insside sch find her. was worried las. lol.
thought she cant walk or something. but saw her walking out
so more relieved. ha. (: i miss her alot in sch. so i sent her
home and i went home. took bus 172 back from cck. straight home.
yeah. relax.. worked out and chat with her online. feel like
calling her.. hope she recovers soon. muack. i love u. well..
i wish all these will nvr end. yeah i'm doing everything t
save us from fading away. wear tat ring and dun take it off ok.
alright blog till here. continue nxt time. good nyte. [:
sigh....

2007-01-13T23:13:00.000+08:00

edited by her.

woke up around 6.30am and msged her. as she's going
for her net ball carnival. haha. sian... she treat me
so cold and i was like sad.. tat she didn bothered?
lmao.. i thought things would be fine today.. but nth
did turned out better.. :( how abt nw.. i also duno..
one moment she could be nice and fine like at tampines
den she could be so totally neglecting of me.. sigh..
so msged her and she replied.. she was changing.
slpt back and wokke up around 10.30. was having a
headaches and feeling very giddy cos i drank tian qi.
i'm desperate to grow tall lmao.. woke up bath and
went downstairs to buy my lunch. had a zinger meal.
waited darn long for it. left my house around 12.30.
sorry i was late laopo. and sorry didn spike hair lor.
den when u angry i feel more crapp.. i more sian..
like i did wan t rush and go see u.. and i thought i
dunc wan spike lerh so i can faster see u.. think u
would rather wana see me and not bother so much abt
my hair haha. but nvr thought u'd still scold me...
:( sad.. so reached cwp abt 1.15. waited for her outside
kfc. and ate kfc with her hui min sk sl. they were
crapping away.. i was emoing one corner.. haha. listenin
t her mp3.. thinking abt wat happened. feeling lousy..
felt worst when she pushed my head. hahah. but nbm..
she was jus playing. (: i really couldn get myself t
say anything out t u. so i kept quiet. sorry tat i
pinched u. ha. not purposely. forgive me? XD
reached tampines and went to buy xxl chicken eat.
lols. we today ate alot. oh ya and bought bbt from
cwp to drink. so as we ate we walked around and talked.
taked bout many stuff lazy to write down... wan see
go read her blog. lmao. ate finished we went t buy
coconut drink and drank.. was tired so we went to sit
down at the macdonalds the chair. chat chat and see
ppl walking pass. talked abt if ppl come in between us.
narh. i trust us. unless the person so pro can plan
until so nice t break us up. LMFAO. anyway. told each
other t trust and say out the truth. yeah i guess i will.
so walked around. somemore and saw her 2 cousins. lol.
one of em called Perlyn shook hands with me. LOL. i was
darn ps when she shook my hand and introduced herself.
i was speechless and dun even noe if i should say my name
i jus moved my lips and mumbled nth. lol. only when she
moved closer t ask wat was it again den i said. zzzz.
we went off back t cwp around 5. and chat on the bus.
she disturb me i disturb her. lol. i love her. and like
hugging her. jus wana hold her tight and watch her slp.
listen t her cute voice everytime she wakes up and stare
at her gong face. Lol. cant stop loving and doing more.
i jus wan all these to last always. i rmbed u once said
forever we'll make it something outstanding, not just a word.
((: muack.

2007-01-07T12:25:00.000+08:00

argh... so lazy to blog lur. haha. past few days jus bored..
schs started ok its not bad. but.. she's not there..
guess like tis is better for both of us. ha. yeah she's doing
fine now at sch. after all the stuff tat happened and did.
laopo i hope wat i said and do hlped u yeah. ha. [: she's
fitting in now and hopefully she'll soon settle down.
i'm glad too. muack. wan t see her happy las. i love u.
second day which was on a thursday 4/1/2007
we watched confessions of pain after sch. damn nice show.
got suspense bloody scene i like. lol. after the show we went
orange julius to get our banana shake. quite nice las. aha.
walked around, saw zack and alicia. see alicia so sian in class.
lols. cheer up. after tat we went home lerh. after sending her
home, i went home. and guess wat. she's not gona leave sch!
shes staying! phew. ha. everyday in class miss her alot.
tis year its all different. even recess also sometimes got tgt.
getting her her uniform soon. tml or when the stock comes.
doing everything i can t stay by her side and jus support her.
no more weeping in the night ok. dunc make me worry nur.
must slp early and get more rest if not no jing shen for sch.
5/1/2007 friday, sch dismissed at 12.15. she came my house.
actually thought of cutting hair but den didn. we bought kfc
for our lunch. nice las. so full lor. didn even finish the cheese
fries. lmao. she did her homework and assessment i gave her.
taught her too. feels great with her by my side. haha.
i sent her home around 4 plus or 5. we went atmiralty and i
walked her home. was it like tat? lol. couldn rmb lerh.
lately i kept being so forgetful. lmao.
6/1/2007 saturday, went to meet her near danny house.
sorry i was late. lol. when was the last time i was early. =x
i'll try las laopo. we went bugis cos i needed to buy virus scan
for my com. total 140 lidat. quite cheap cos got offer lols.
walked around simlim abit and saw ex wgs student. and she said
the ppl there very tiko. hahaha. yeah lur. so later on we ate katong
laksa. not very nice. and my throat was fucked. so cant taste shiet.
i ended up eating another bowl of wanton noodle, pontian. nice nice/
can taste la. but swallow down fcuking dry. woo . whole day jus kept
making me wana sscold vulgarities. lmao. we shopped around bugis
street as she wanted t search for bag and belts. she bought a pair
of earring. lolls. and saw a bag she liked. we gona 1 year soon! gona
get her all her stuff on one single day. yeah. blog again nxt time.
laopo theres only one u, tat makes u so special. i wont leave u.
where would i find someone who look like u anymore. i jus need u. <3

2007-01-02T21:15:00.000+08:00

tis morning woke up at 9.15. went t bath den change.
did workout and used alil of com. and went out around 1010.
was feeling darn giddy and hungry cos i used up all my energy.
reached her house at 11.05am. was late for 5 mins. lol.
after she came down we went t alicia's blk cos geri wan send
pics t her for upload. later on we walked t siew lin house the
bus stop and took 168 t bedok interchange. went the cinema
there called princess[ =.= ]. we watched night at the museum.
watching it the second time. only after buyin the ticket den
i told her tat i watched alrdy. ha she forgot. but nbm. [:
the ticket was. zzz chapalang. and the seats were hard like hell.
i even banged my knee. cinema was small too. reduced by half lmao.
after the show we went t eat our lunch as she was hungry.
we ate the mutton curry with rice + yong tau fu. later on we went
t buy honey dew soya milk from mr bean. jolly bean. while drinkin
she searched for the shop tat offer eyebrow pluckin service lmao!
duno called eyebrow wat las. lol. so after afew rounds we found it
and i sat there fell aslp as she was lyin down pluckin. lols.
later on duno why she suddenly walked towards me. she wanted me t
pluck also cos the person say 2 person 8 dollars. 1 person 5 dollars.
so i anything las. lol. go for it.. didn noe mine was so damn long...
and thick.. took a damn long time t duno wat.. pluck and shave? trim?
duno. ok payed money and left. walked awhile more and took 168 back
t woodlands interchange. she was in pain so went ntuc t buy medicine.
before tat saw kim guan and some ex wgs. duno who. she ate her med
den we headed home. walked tgt and talk talk chat chat play play on
the way. lols. reached her blk downstairs and we sat down and chat.
now i knew wat she was thinkin. glad but i guess i cant make her feel
at ease with jus my words. so gotta prove it to her. yeah i will [:
7pm she reached home. and i went home too. slpt on the train standing.
almost fell. reached home around 8.30pm. bought 2 zinger burger.
one for dad and me. sian.. i really hate it when he talks t me abt
sch stuff. maybe i jus dun wan parents t noe? lol. only results.
they dunc noe wat i've done in sch either LMAO. wat can i say...
i'm jus mischevious... zzz.. she's gona do fine tml. yeah. have a
nice rest laopo and call me or msg if anything. [: i love u!

2007-01-01T19:18:00.000+08:00

got up around 11 plus tis morning. msged her and on com.
went t bath cos dad and grandma said going to cousin's house.
after bathin used com for like 15mins and went out.
reached cousin house chat chat with him and play with dog.
name's troy. bored also and so slpy the whole day. really
tired. cos didn slp early. 4 plus am msged her good nyte den
i send t slp. was afraid of something. [: think she noes.
tats why i couldn slp. den.. slpy the whole day. watched
two cousin play NS den went t watch tv. showing troy.
same as the dog's name lols. ok. had hokkien mee for lunch.
uncle bought. went home around 6.30pm. reach home in less than
10mins. she called me when i was going t do her mp3. we got
into a tiff again. sorry laopo. hope u forgive me. u were like
i also cant hear anything! and i got abit fedup.. sorry.
when u hung up i was like wth . wat i do.. but i think back
maybe i was at fault first. sorry. happened twice today lerh.
once in the morning and now. morning i duno y. now i might noe.
but anyway. lately u've been uptight. so.. sorry ok. i didn mean
it. muack. tml we're meeting! wee i cant wait eh. been missing
u all day and finally u called i didn noe it would turn out lidat.
call me tonight will u. i'm sorry. tml meet 11am under ur bblk yeah!
see you soon. sorry too.

2006-12-30T01:38:00.000+08:00

today went out with her, danny, gp, ah boi, sk t steamboat.
at marina bay there somewhere. took bus 400. not 700..
met up with her at atmiralty mrt station upstairs. danny was
late cos broke his toe nail. we three took train down t marina
bay at abt 4.45pm. the whole journey passed like darn quickly.
me and her see girls lmao. and compare who more chio. LOL.
den talk t danny on the train also. when reached the steamboat
place. we got a table and we cooked some stuff t eat first.
while waiting for sk and sl. they cabbed down. and reached faster
than i had expected lmao. den we all started cookin and gp came
1hr later? duno. ds didn came. sorry lar bro. i not last min
change. is my stead buay song arhs. so. she and i planned t
go down there first and u guys jus come later. ps arhs.
eat and crapped. and killed crabs and prawns. lol. geri first time
wash crab arhs. lol. taught her how t rip the whole damn thing
apart. lol. and in the end she ate all the crab lol. i ate some
cos the taste was like. zzz. duno salty and got juice come out.
i ate more prawns. but she ate like 1 and a half tub lidat. lol.
first time see her eat lidat sial. such a big eater. lmao. heavy
weight champion arh she. LMAO. and sk was like so afraid of the
live prawns den keep running away from it when it jumped. geri
tried t scare her with it and she shouted and ran behind lols.
and sl keep eating veg only and i keep snatching with her cos
its so damn nice when its in the soup and its soft. hahaha.
she got gastric prob so only ate tat and drank soup. lols.
i ate halfway stomach ache. normal ache. okay. back t eating.
ate not say alot today. ha. maybe someday go again. with the
whole gang. not missing out anyone. march holis or CNY? lols.
ate until 9pm den we went off lerh. oh yar and darn alot alot
of food was wasted cos put in the soup keep boiling den nvr eat.
so all stuck t the btm of the pot den chao tar. lmao. den must
change new one. and make new soup lol. me her sk sl cab back t
woodlands ave. 2 168 bustop at bridge opposite sl house. den
me and her walked t cwp t buy bbt. danny and gp think go pay pool
i think. so while walking towards cwp saw alicia. they hugged.
and she accompanied us t cwp buy bbt. as they talked abt cia's
hardtime right now i jus listened and queued up t buy bbt. had
peach green tea. not bad huh. nice. lol. and walked back t cia's
blk t send her home. shared stuff and told her some so called
advise or rather stuff we would do if we were t be in her positon.
after tat walked with geri t vista t pee and walked her home.
i love her alot. miss her right now. sch gona reopen. i noe she
can go thru everything with ease. [: and overheard wat her mum
said t her when she was telling t t alicia. sorry. didn mean it.
but i was beside u. [: and i kept thinkin abt it and i felt bad.
am i really holding her back too much..... sigh... but anyway..
great day today.. love u laopo. muack. [:

2006-12-28T13:27:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wonder if she really cared. :(
i'm not gona waste time saying how i feel.
its pointless and useless. i dunc need
understanding. only u need right. tats y
i dunc need an apology from u. as u've
said countless of times. i'm sorry. wat am
i t you. it doesnt matter t me. weak t u?
haha. see you soon.

2006-12-26T23:40:00.000+08:00

ok back to blog again. cos she asked me to. lols.
lets see.. okay last sat. on 23 went out with coussie
t vivo. den went there sho and check out clothes for
x'mas. met him on the bus 188 t vivo from cck.
chat on the bus and reached there we jus walked around
and shopped. lol. still the same old us. like so long
nvr like tat alrdy. he bought a nice shirt ffrom pull
and bear. saw afew nice shirts i wanted t buy lol.
later on took bus back t cck and watched night at the museum.
really nice show. everyone must watch. after tat go home.
reached home 10 plus.
and slpt kinda late. woke up duno wat time the nxt day.
played com and chatted with her on the phone i think.
went out at 6 and not a single damn cab tat noes how to go
siglap hill.. lmao. waited until sky dark ler.. den finally
gt cab driver noe how t go there. zzz.
reached there around 7 plus. sat around talk t aunties there
oh yar was at dad's friends house t celebrate christmas. haha.
and ate buffet for dinner. drank wine. lmao. the aunties so
funny..zz talked abt stuffs. gf, gifted child, blogs, etc.
den later went t attic t play bball and soccer. yawn.. bored.
went home at around 1 plus. i think... got a christmas prezzy.
a OP wallet. but gave mum. cos i had my own even more special.
not gona lose it. hahaha. or change it or watever. [:
25/12 monday was CHRISTMAS!! lols. swit. i planned so long.
but things didn really quite worked out as i planned. ha.
my surprise and stuff nur.. movies.. dineer. awww... fcuk...
lol.. met up with laopo under her blk. i was having a darn
diarrhea and stomach ache from last night. went vista to shiet.
den went t meet alicia under her blk i think. t send pics?
okay den we walk t cwp and saw desmond. later on boarded the
train and towards habourfront. [: reached there went t shop.
i bought her her nini! hahaha. hope she liked it las. [:
den she so ps dunc dare carry the plastic bag. zz. i carry lor.
hhaha. and we ate lots and lots of food at FOOD REPUBLIC.
i bought alot of 2 long of xia jiao and 2 chicken jiao.
so ex T.T 12 bugs. lol. and so little but. nbm. shiok jiu hao.
and she bought llots of food too. we ate until our stomach
gona explode lerh. lmao. went t shop around more for my
clothes and jo christmas prezzy. den walked until i leh also
tired. searched for my vest at G2000 but no hab. ha. but
she thinks no nice so i dunc intend t buy anymore. and wanted.
t buy a long sleeve from pull and bear too. but she also
think not nice. den i was alil upset lars. lol. cos i also
not sure wan buy anot mah. den since say not nice den i also
didn manage t bought anything. except for converse shoe later
on at cwp. alot alot of sales everywhere. i'm planning t get
my new phone nxt year. ha. walkman phone i suppose cos i no
hab mp3. spoilt alrdy. lol. i sent her home and we chatted
along the way and she reached home exactly at 9. ha.
hope she's really happy.
today she accompanied me tgt with my parents t the airport.
cos mum going back t bangkok. i miss mum now. lol. thanks
laopo. for sending her off too. ha. hope u also had some fun.
i guess mum and dad also let me be with her. i'm glad and happy.
and when mum was going off t check in she kissed and hugged
her. LMAO. SHE WAS SO SHOCKED HAHAHAHA. tats normal las.
later on me and her went tampines t look for my long sleeve
and her belt. went 77 street and after tat we went t take neoprint
hahaaha. she has alot of decorative talent lmao. maybe cos she's
a girl las. tats wat she said when i asked. lol. i love her.
yeah every night hearing u say good night over the phone makes me
fall sound aslp. ha. muack. wan us t last forever. i'll try. [:

2006-12-22T11:58:00.000+08:00

lately too many stuff happening. dunc noe wat t post.
lol. on the 18/12 everyone went back collect results..
i accompanied her t bugis after tat.. shopped around.
went t temple t pray. i prayed for the same things as
usual. mostly for her. i told myself i wana work hard.
at least not letting her worry abt me so often. and i
jus wana stay right beside her always t cheer her up.
at least not worry so much abt her. she can do it.
i believe in my heart. believed in her. muack. laopo..
i'll always be here t support u yeah. alot of ppl will.
tat day when u said i was the one who pulled u out. was
i hearing correctly? ha. in my heart i was really happy.
those words meant alot t me. yeah at least someone still
needs me? lmao. kinda made me felt somewhat important.
lmao.. zzz.. hope i did cheered her up a lil. now shes
having a clear mind alrdy. so i've got not much t worry.
except when we're not in the same sch. sigh..
19/12 went out arhs? was it. i cant rmb much. bad memory.
i noe i did something very wrong. i promised i wouldn and
i did it.. sorry. oh i rmb now. second day is meet her and
cia. went raffles city? i think. and me and her went off
in like half an hour because she had t get back t school
with her parents. i went t ds house and later on many things
happen.. argh i so lazy t type lol. chatting with her on
msn. went home around 9 plus.
20/11 she went visit grandma in the morning and i was at home.
i went sch give the form and we met up at cwp. watched movie.
with ds and jason. den sent her home. i took mp3 home again.
cos she coming my house the nxt day. gona pick her up nxt day.
21/12 8 plus woke up prepared and stuff and went t pick her up
under her blk. i was hungry so i ate cup noodle. lol. delayed
so much time nur. ps and when she reached my house was 12 plus.
she used com. things happened. but luckily it ended too.
i love u geri. so dunc hav doubts ok. i'll try t make u assured.
trust me. i wana see tat ring on always. heh. we left at 5+
reached cwp around 6? and she accompany me eat bk. lol. later
on we left. okay we're dead broke again. lol. x mas. sigh...
and we chatted along the way when sending her home. abt stuff
and sch and studies. tuition and stuffs. [: yeah i guess shes
really alright and gona jiayou alrdy huh. happy. [:
TODAY. woke up duno wat time didn check. searched for her. lol
lame. =.= she also not around. wtf. still gong gong. den went
online and see if she was on. she wasnt so waited and missed her.
finally she's on now and i'm gona go chat with her lerh. hahaha.
bye. blog again... when she ask me to. LMAO.

2006-12-16T13:43:00.000+08:00

sian. them tired of everything thats coming my way.
here they go again, folks at home babbling away...
been waiting for this day to arise again. finally...
wanted to msg her and tell her abt it.. i'm sad..
but she's happy right now. dunc wana ruin her day..
sigh... u guys are jus making me damn lazy to talk.
u didn even knew that u had mistaken me. and jus
started shooting at me.. in my heart i was laughing
some kinda parent u are jus lookin at things from
the outside.. lol.. i'll prove to u lar and if i do
dunc blame me for shooting u back.. fcuker.. i'm
so close to hatred.. zzz.. i wished she was here
comforting me right now tellin me stuffs and reasons
for me to carry on.. been staying at home for the past
3 days i'm fcuking bored lars. they really talking lyke
shiet sial. ccb.. bth liao...holidays suck... i rather
go to sch and dun see them i'd feel better. sch's lyke
my getaway. at least its always a valid reason. no
matter how many times u asked me to quit sch. i'd say no.
quit for wat. no matter how much u suan me in my studies
i wont be affected. i'd try not t take a single cent after
ns. come on lar lyke u said at 21 u'll kik me out? i'd
be glad. [: nth changed over the years things remained.
nxt week going out. gona cut my hair nxt week too.
sian...

2006-12-13T09:39:00.000+08:00

yawn i jus woke up. been so long since i blog. aha.
maybe i should blog more often as i'm learning to type
the proper way lol. slow lars but still can manage.
ytd she came my house we watched save ur last fance for me.
she watched finished lerh and now my turn to watch. lol.
mummy came home after awhile cos she was at prime buying
some ingredients to cook her thai laksa. later on we 3
ate tgt. so funny la she couldn stop giggling and so ps.
lol but i jus play play and burped loudly lol mum said i
no manners and she also agree hah. so serious meh. play oni.
fcuk typing the proper way is jus killing me lar.
always couldn reach for the letter 'p' my small finger
must go up lyke so uncomfortable. zzz but den got used
t it lerh will type much more fasdter than i had typed before.
last nyte and last last nyte was kinda really hectic. lol.
after she said those stuffs to me i still could forget it.
lyke gp told me dun rmb these kind of things. i hoope i can.
i pick her up under her blk ytd ha. was a lil late cos woke
up diily dally den see the time oh shiet alrdy. this week
so broke lerh left a few cents sigh. if tis week go out with
group i think i have to eat grass liao. lol. where would
the grass be greener, on the other side of the world? haha.
bought her a spaghetti 2 days ago was it? from fareast.
blossoms derh i tot it was nice too on her hha. [:
pretty har my baobei. XD' hahaha. i used up a full 60$ in jus
2 days haha. cool. argh nth much to blog lerh. waiting for
her msg now. my christmas........ sigh... why the fcuk did
i tell her my plans.... how dumb can i get...... ZZZ.
i miss her..

2006-12-05T22:02:00.000+08:00

back t blog again. ummm. sunday attended birthday celebration
for great granny. hah. shes 94 i think. [: still as strong.
went t chijmes. tat place was nice. celebrate at cantonese
restaurant. ate many nice food. ha. reached home abt 12 plus.
cos we couldn get a damn taxi lol.
monday went bugis with her. woke up early so i could prepeare
and went her house downstairs meet her den took bus t cwp.
i bought cheese balls. she lied t me on the bus say wat the
store close cos ppl eat den food poisoning and she sounded
so real and i believed! lmao! haha. reach there bought 10.
and she brought me go see her clip. saw ler wanted t buy
for her de. den she say too ex so didn buy lur. ha.
and she was late for home and she ran bare foot LOL. i laugh
and ran with her lyke crazy. finally sent her home and i was
so exhausted. sweat and wana die lerh. and thanks for the shirt.
i love it alot THANK YOU. [: <3
Today went with her t town. woke up extremely early cos she
msg me. ha. asked me bring her out? ha. i slpt back until 10.30am
jumped out of bed and tot i was late. left my house and 11 plus
after having breakfast. and met her at her house there 912 busstop
we walked t atmiralty and took a train t orchard. actually planned
t watch movie but she wanted t shop shop so didn. ha. [: she
bought a sphagetti from cineleisure. ha. and we headed home. [:
i still miss my woodlands home haha. if i was stayin there jiu hao.
den no need always make her waste money come my house. so far. =x
hmm.. how t make a handmade card??? i love u darling. hope t see
u always happy and smiling. hugg.

2006-12-01T21:15:00.000+08:00

went chalet on the 29 oct. jus came back home today.
met geri at cwp. walked around and bought 10 cheese
balls. ha. damn nice. lol i addicted alrdy. [: after tat
walked around and she bought a concealer from face
shop. after tat we left for tampines. took 168 there.
bought bbt and we both first time ate tempura. ha.
not bad quite nice. i lyke t chew it. shiok arhs. lol.
after tat we had a tiff. its over now. anyways i've
found out certain stuffs too. ha. guess i should've
known when t back away. sigh.. sorry i shouted at u.
u said i changed haha. well.. if u had jus listened t me.
but i saw in the tag. u said if come msg you. maybe
tats why u didn stayed up there? ha. met up with ds
gao chao sheng qiang and we took bus 3 t downtown east.
i was really angry las. t you it isnt anything much.
reach lerh collect key and went t the place. f08.
she go in only chiong up and put bag. later me ds and her
went t walk around the beach... they said they were
hungry so we went cheers and bought cup noodle later
walked around and bought milkshakes i think. forgot
which came first... went back f08 and cooked noodle.
i wasnt in a mood t eat. but she asked me t eat anw.
i ate some she ate most of the two cups add tgt. lols.
i wasnt in a mood really.. wished i could tell u exactly
how i feel. would u laugh in my face? haha. lmao. sians.
after eating played poker cards. same 3 of us... later on
euson, maris, gb and gang came.. we continued t play until
night falls. she lost the necklace i bought for her. sigh.
wished i could get her a new one but it wouldn hab tat
same feeling when she wears it. haha. hai.. and i couldn
find it.. during night. gp and danny came. we were worried
tat they were stil not talking t each other. lol. but got faked
by them haha. wth. bathed and we all went upstairs play
cards. gp gotta work the nxt day so danny and her didn
stayed. later on viki ph kc came. they all played mahjong.
after danny and gp left. me and her decided t slp as she was
tired. but we jus stayed in the room until 4 plus am den slp.
cos the room got gb and qing bing they all kept talking and
making fun of others. we all laughed and talked. kinda fun.
geri said she was vulgar lols. cos she hang out with us too much
lol. woke up on the second day at 7.45am. she bluff say it was
8 and wan faster go brush teeth and wash hair. den eat breakfast.
me her and ds went t eat at one small store. stuffs there darn ex.
i paid 4 bucks for bandung 2 eggs and bread tat was size of 3 fingers.
zzzzz. waste my fcuking money. me and her shared money
thru the whole chalet. both of us tgt spent all our money abt 115$.
lol. didn noe where it all went. later on siew lin camea. and we
played cards for awhile again. later on we all went escape and
play the rides. i so long nvr get any thrill in my life haha.
found tat it wasnt really tat scary. sprained both my wrist due
t the force. pain lyke hell. me and her went tampines t buy
tempura as she wanted t eat it again. and kept talkin abt it
since the first day. so me and her went and i was so fcukin slpy.
i slpt on the bus lol. until reach tampines i was lyke gona die.
go anywhere also must sit down and slp. haha. den met up with
sean at mrt station and we took bus 3 back t chalet. me and her
went upstairs t slp. we wer so tired las. slpt awhile jiu at time for
bbq lerh. i was starving but i ate a lil only. duno why lol. i guess
we kept running around tats why. sl and sean rented a two seater
bike and i first time ride so me and ds test first. it wasnt so hard.
i got on only den everything was smooth. i tompang her t beach and
looked for kc and ah boi. geri took pic of them sitting side by side at
the rock. lols. went t return bike and den went for bbq. me and sheng
qiang were cooking the stuffs. geri was marinating the chicken wings.
siew lin was darn idiot arh. she played with the chicken wing lol.
press press and massage it. lmao.. after eat abit gao chao went t
buy half a carton of tiger beer and i bought 2 bottles of e33. sian.
i drank one can. den i drank on bottle. wasnt tipsy. jus high.
wanted t drink another bottle of e33. wasnt really happy las.
but she and siew lin lyke also got prob and she cried. so i didn
wan let her worry for me too. den didn drink.. sians. let kc drink.
me her sl ds danny went t the beach and sat on a rock. took pics.
went back t chalet and sl must reach home by 10. kc sent her t
take cab. kc didn seemed in the mood. he was thinkin abt stuff.
even disturb him also he didn react. first time see him lidat. ha.
later on we went see sean izzul and hafiz they all play pool. wanted
t play also but closed lerh. den we played arcade daytona. i suck
now. too long no play. forget all the timing liao. haha. bored..
later on went back den me and her jiu go slp lerh. she was really
tired. and i couldn slp. thought and last year. and this year.
she said i couldn make her feel cosy and i become very gao wei.
haha.. sians. how t eat big size lols.. hear liao i also heart pain..
i thought abt stuff, seemed lyke she was jus too slpy t bother. ha.
but nbm la. today woke up duno wat time. bathed and went back
t slp again. after tat jiu go home liao. i felt the urge t smoke again.
i felt lyke shiet. i didn noe wat t do. haha. i couldn handle tis sick
feelin in my heart and the pain tat is jus eating my insides. those
words i cant seem t say t you. made even more lyke dying.
sigh....... i wished i was in control.. wheres my confidence. i'm not
what i'm anymore. i dunc noe wat i'm now either. certain stuff
i do.. i jus wasnt in the mood anymore. its lyke for the sake of u
den i do. inside. i feel so cold blooded. i wished u knew tis and
wana assure me. i treat u lyke an animal. maybe i'm one.?
i wana be happy, myself, normal... i cant do tis alone.. will you
be here for me? so much things i wished u knew... why do u always
tell me t talk t you nxt time.. nxt time i would've changed worst
alrdy.. i wasted so much chance.. yet another year gone and another
thing i regret i didn do... sigh.. =(

2006-11-28T11:05:00.000+08:00

yawn. last nyte slpt at 3 plus. hope by tml can pia another rr.
woke up at 10 plus. ate toast bread and milo. nowadays i eat
very little cos i have some indigestion. always stomach ache
after eating any kinds of food. ytd she came my house. she
ate her seafood claypot bought from jurong point den got
stomach ache after tat. lol. i sent her home and it was raining
den nvr go swimming. hahaha. Xp den we went t cwp gai gai.
i bought 3 donuts and 1 large fries. so nice woo. lol. missed
mac's french fries. [: den ate cavana the balls. duno called wat.
ha. and we walked somemore. den took at bus home. and...
got down at her house bus stop and we sat under her blk
talk for awhile. she bought those duno wat stick on nails derh.
she stuck the brand on my little finger lol. reach home only
play mu. den went t bath. ate my dinner at around 10pm.
and back t play com until 2 plus am daddy came in saw me
using com. he nvr angry lerh hha. nvr shout or wat lyke b4.
happy. [: but of cos i will stop after the game las. ha. i also
listened. lyke laopo always told me t. ha. thanks. i miss yoo~
tml chalet!! YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. MK<3GERI

2006-11-28T10:53:00.000+08:00

hellos! (:

2006-11-21T20:14:00.000+08:00

today lyke got much t say lols. thinkin of wat i could recall the other time. uh bought 2 new games for my ps2 crime life gang wars and need for speed carbon. she accompanied me there thanks so much. made her walk round and round and she sweat lyke mad. sorry. but thanks laopo. hmm.. think i wont be slpin but jus lie on bed.. i'm starting t miss u. u put on hold for so long ha.. i going t do self reflection. see where i've gone wrong. call me soon. MISS YOU~

2006-11-21T20:03:00.000+08:00

so much happened lately hahas. quarreled with dad.
hopefully now clear things up. got better with her.
its been raining so darn heavily these days. sians..
i miss her.. but her prepaid low so she cant msg me.
sorry i bugged u sigh.. last nyte i ton. nth much t do.
really damn damn boring. wished i had stayed home
ton some other day when theres alot of ppl tgt lar.
didn slp last nyte all the way until 8.plus went her
house from danny's place. bought a packet of milk
and bread t eat cos i was hungry. waited for her t
come down. she woke up late ahas. she's so cute^^
went swimming pool slpt awhile. while she sl and
sl sis talked by the pool. i was bored too. after tat
they went off t baby pool lols. den left me alone there.
i was more sian. got those neglected feelings hahas.
but i told myself its nth. they needa talk ryte. lol.
cleared up many stuffs. guess we've both changed.
after so much tat has happened. lately lyke u easily
jiu angry lerh cos i cant hear clearly over the phone
or i jus bugg u too much. hahs. i'm sorry narhs.
i'm jus bored, jus wanted chit chat with u...
got scolded by u in the msg. ha. i noe lars. u say one
den u wont do two.. and i didn noe ur prepaid no $.
maybe i forgot tat u told me. dunc so fierce narh.
sians. i asked wat were u doing oveer the last msg.
but u didn reply.. so i send tat msg lur.. didn noe
ended up got scolded.. lmao.. nxt time i ask u somethin
jus reply can. dunc care wat u say will call or wat lars.
hais. sometimes u talk lyke u've got so much t hide.
but in fact nth. i also duno lar. everytime over the
phone i dunc noe how t prevent myself from not
making u du lan because i cant hear clearly. sigh.
sometimes i wished i could jus hang up or ask u
not t call.. better for u. ur pi qi also quite bao zhao.
sigh.. when ur good t me ur good.. when ur bad
or mood got something wrong u will sound so sian
lyke i can nvr make u happy.. lol.. abit things lyke
big things and will talk not so nicely t me.. lol..
heck lar.. i'm tired of needin t say how i feel alrdy.
let me clear things myself.. u wont wana understand.
lyke u told me its me who gotta understand u. ha.
wonder wat ur doing.. i'm so slpy.. sian.. guys...
must be responsible and stuffs. might as well make
them cold blooded so they wont feel anything
whenever the girl treats them no so nicely they
wouldn think over it and end up quarrelin
wouldn tat be great for both parties.. sigh.. girls..
i guess i really noe nth abt them at all..
when i see her always worryin abt how her friends
are doing when they're sad or cropped up with
probs. i see her so gan jiong and wana talk t the
person and dig everything out and find out stuff.
when it comes t me... damn i dunc really noe. lol..
i guess i should jus go lie down and slp..
u wouldn hab anything t say t me over the phone.
and i'm tired.. good nyte.. swit dreams.. <3 u. geri..

2006-11-05T23:22:00.000+08:00

nth t do now. played many rounds dota.
today i'm bored of it alrdy. gona stop.
more things t worry abt. am i wrong t?
lmfao. i dunc understand either. does
worryin abt others give them stress and
make them so fan until they wana stab
themselves and die rather than hear me
talk? wa lan eh i give u space lar.
go out with friends anyone u wan..
even those u dunc even fcukin noe one.
jus hiding behind that mother fcuking
screen. typin. damn du lan. lyke dunc
wish t tell me anything lidat. its not
i dunc give u face leh. but wtf? lmao.
do i give a fuck abt them i dunc care
if u dunc lyke lur. can side them if
u wan. girls jus hab too much t hide.
the devil in me will not let anyone
off for hurting you. someone try. _|_
i'm the devil mother fuckers.

2006-11-04T11:47:00.000+08:00

i didn slpt much last nyte. was still msgin her
during 5am. noeing she's aslp but jus wanted t
msg her anyway. rmb she said in the middle of
the nyte even if u knew i'm aslp i'd be happy
if u got things wana msg me so morning i could
read them. i noe u cared. i jus didn get things
straight before i approached u and said all those
stuff den somehow forced u t go right at the edge
of the cliff. made me one die lerh. even though
with danny and ds still laughing and talkin i jus
couldn let the thought of u slip my mind for a sec.
i kept thinkin how, why i said, how t resolve will
be go back nicely and happily again? i held on tight
t my phone last nyte.. even downstairs when i'm lyin
on the road taking a picture and thought it was fun.
i couldn stop thinkin of u. until they said a car was
coming den i quickly ran back. i ate two cup noodles.
drank peach tea as we bought 1.5litre t share den walk
around my neighbourhood. i did things dat mde me wana
stay awake all nyte. until they all started fallin aslp
at 5am. after awhile my eyes felt heavy and i slpt..
after 2 hours my stomach started t ache from eatin too
much. i didn cared t go t the toilet. jus wana lie on
my bed and think think think.. we're seperated.. well wat
does tat signify? i noe its not a breakup. u jus wan me
t leave u alone. i wouldn dare think of anything but jus
hopin for the best? lols.. i've changed u in someway..
made u cried badly again. in what way am i good t you.
cos whenever we start quarrellin its always me who blew
things up. i'm not gona die tryin, so i'll try again..
laopo... if u cant take it anymore.. tell me.. i'll go..
but no matter wat the love we had was real and happy
moments still linger in my mind. reading my tag board
i knew wats happy and wats not..those post u tagged and my
replies.. its lyke last nyte i became a totally different
person. i'm sorry.. really really sorry.. i noe tis time.
u wont let me close t you lerh. or let me mend anything.
sayin things tats too weird t even believe ryte? i've gt
t tell u tis.. ytd u pushed me t the edge was because of
the things u said and asked me back. they were all puzzlin.
not ur actions.. did i jus missed u real bad cos i didn
get t spend a cuple of hours with you? and ended up being
sad and thinkin tat i needed u for another reason? i dunc noe.
cos when u asked me tell me now why do u need me so much?
i didn noe how t answer. yeah why.. maybe i dunc and made
myself think i did.. i think too much lerh.. tat always made
us quarrel lyke mad. or leave u no able t slp and cryin..
i'd learn t chage tis habit and not think wats not right.
get things straight and feelings straight before i start talkin
t you. i dunc wan us t break apart.. alrite. i wished u could
gimme one last try. t love u the way i've always said t you.
lyke i said every decision lies in you for our relationship.
cos i think ur the girl. its my duty t treat u ryte if i love u.
so. i didn did i? yeahs.. i dunc noe why not u tell me. [:
i still love u alot. nths changed my love for u. hope u still
have fun lyke everyday on com and outside. i miss u dearly.
i love you baby. always.

2006-11-03T23:27:00.000+08:00

sigh.. had the worst dream i could ever imagine
would even happen t me.. made me cry. lols.
maybe i loved her too much? ha. do i? laopo.
do u think so? lmao.. been needin you the whole
day eversince morning. need u t comfort. need
ur warm huggs. missed tat soft lips. =X haha.
i missed u so badly. you noe marh? i dunc lyke
t speak in tis happy tune. i dunc wan t. not now.
cos i'm not happy. sad.. not abt jus now no more.
guess tats enuff for the both of us before we're
left speechless. and really get tired of each other.
sian. i'm so bored now.. i wan so much t talk t you
over the phone.. i wished u could make some time
for me now. i cant get used t this. everytime u do tis.
its lyke at home. we've got no time t talk i guess.
i noe lyke u said. no matter wat u still love. we still
go out tgt, you still made time t come my house. we
still got msg and chat on the phone.. yeah.. when someone
needs you at a different time. for a different reason.
all that doesn't come in at all. there's no link at all.
you cant mix happy and sad.. no one can be both.
they'd still be sad more because usually we hide it
and all the pain tgt. it den starts eatin us alive.
isnt tat jus true? hhahs. why am i even sayin all these
how could i make u understand this. how can i make u notice.
=( parents are scolding me badly for askin friends over..
sigh.. wat can i say.. its the wrong time and its so late.
i didn asked them permission i only asked grandma and noeing
tat grandma would surely let... sorry.. no alcohol tis time.
lmao. laopo.. i didn wana wei nan you t rush and go bath
all these jus for me.. i guess you've done enuf. played ur
part? i dunc noe.. why do i feel lyke cryin whhen i'm typin
tis. am i sissy. LMAO. i guess i'm jus too weak in the heart.
as i type tis post i'm also listening t the song she jus sent,
lou xia de nu ren.. maybe i wont try t wana ma fan u nxt time.
i dunc wana hear u say sorry anymore.. whenever i've got thngs
t say.. ur lyke neglecting me when i'm needin u now.
busy doing ur things.. i dunc mind really. i didn get fedup.
well... what hurts the most?? u noe?? i love u and all the
times spent tgt.. mk<3yyan :)

2006-10-31T11:35:00.000+08:00

ytd went out early t east coast with laopo.
took bus there and reached abt 10 plus.
rented bike and rode around. she talked abt
wat she used t do last time with her dad.
she missed it alot. we rode for 2 hours.
at opne point i fell and injured myself.
i was too playful. lols. narh deserved it.
after tat went t bath. kc and ds asked if
wanted t watch movie. so we went t watch
after shoppin for awhile. must chiong back
zzz. can see she's not happy cos she dunc
lyke the show and lyke forced t come lur.
cos kc lyke say if we dunc go he also
dunc go. lmao. if we cant agree on one show
wat for go lur. anyways after the show i
sent her home and went upstairs her door
outside take vcd. after tat i went home.
halfway danny called asked where am i and
said wana accompany me eat dinner so i
took train back t woodlands from marsiling.
reached home around 9 plus. was on the phone
with her all along. talked and everythings
fine. [: after tat when she called me again
after the channel 8 show finished she's so
different. very fan very pekcek angry her.
lols made me bth andd duno wat happened. =x
sorry i got abit frustrated too. chat with
u on msn half the time u are always doing
things and we wont chat much. everytime as
me t wait. over the phone also sometimes
keep askin me t wait. hear liao also sian.
lols. but its alrite. i understood las.
whenever u say i duno de lah lols den i so
pekcek lur. lmao. i bwg straight away. zzz.
wat i noe lols the rest noe har. lyke every1
thinks i duno u lidat. wats bf for ryte lmao.
i forget everything. i dunc wish t rmb. but
ur attitude these fews. hai. nth t say lar.
sometimes lyke take drugs lidat will act up.
lols. okay lars. but after awhile will better.
dunc noe how t tell u narh. hope u read lur.
i noe sometimes i too dumb or wat lars. den make
you pekcek and angry. lols. ps okay. tats all.
jus try not t so angry. i dunc lyke also lols.

2006-10-28T23:04:00.000+08:00

woke up abt 10 plus tis morning. she msg me.
say she go out meet cia. i slpt back awhile.
woke up bath brush teeth and eat breakfast.
com tv slp chat talk t her on phone. [:
ate lunch, dinner, breafast. ytd she came my
house. played, snack. planned t watch movie
but didn cos no time. hahs. we were late.
so went t cck eat xxl chicken and oyster mee
sua without oyster more chicken HAHA!
sat by the stairs and we fed each other. [:
went back cck walk walk talk talk laugh laugh.
after tat bought bbt and went back t sembawang.
walk walk around in this fashion waited for her
t try out clothes. i kept yawning. so tired.
after tat jiu send her home lerh. hughugkisskis.
said goodbye. went home ate dinner bathed. com.
3 plus den slp. yawnz. gona slp early tonyte..
i miss my baobei so much. <3>

2006-10-28T22:21:00.000+08:00

2006-10-26T11:40:00.001+08:00

last nyte slpt early cos it was so boring.
fever is almost gone. left with headaches.
woke up around 10.30am ate breakfast and
back t com. currently playing cs. sians.
she's watching vcd. no one wana talk t me.
hahaha. morning shouted and mum cos she was
darn irritating. maybe i dunc love them as
much anymore. they cant stop talking.
i dunc lyke t rush i hate to. and both are
always rushing me t do tis and dat if not
they'll say things lyke later u wont do alrdy
why not jus do now. wtf. how u noe i wont do?
lmfao. do anything also wan chap. why cant u jus
leave me the hell alone. i'm fan enuff.
wanted t talk t her abt it. but she's busy.
think she'll jus tell me t tell her later.
anyway its small matter so nbm lur. hha.
she hear ler also will sian barh.
i'm such a problem child. damn. why was i even
born. wat do i enjoy in life anymore.
being someone's bf isnt so easy neither.
if one person could be so positive nth t him
is nvr negative den there must be something wrong.
u need t psycho urself t think positive isnt tat
alil bit lyke nuts. when things i put ryte in ur
face and ur experiencing it now. can u run away
and tell urself no its good. lets be positive.
if my heart tells me its fine it wouldn feel hurt.
u said i treat you better? hurhur. i dunc even noe
if i'm las. can't u treat me better then? lols.
maybe ur ryte i should change alrdy. control my
own thinkin. dunc let it run wild and think tat
wateva u do its not wat it seems. ryte? if u were
in my shoes.. wateva u do.. its jus wat it seems..
lyke when i felt lyke u didn care. u said u did
but jus didn show it. u noe not everything.
between u and me also can say one okay. certain
things shouldn be said and shouldn be asked for.
dunc u get it. i'd be thick skinn if i asked.
i'd be selfish t others if i asked. so wat if
i'm stading in a special place in ur heart. so
wat if u gave me the previledge t say anything
or ask anything. i'd still noe wat t ask and
not t alrite. so i chose t keep it t myself..
u werent happy with i didn wana tell you..
tell u lerh u more unhappy. there's so much
cut here and there t wat i wana say. cos cant.
u wont get the whole picture okay. dunc get angry
with me lerh. everything's fine ryte now. [:
ilu*

2006-10-24T17:31:00.000+08:00

when was the last time i blogged. couldn rmb.
currently waiting for her call and msn reply.
hahas. i'm dead bored. having fever. feeling weak.
tis sucks. everyone's out and having fun.
i'm stuck at home with parents sians...
mums. karaokin. so noisy.. zzz lmao. not nice =xx
went t lie down t slp for awhile but couldn.
closed my eyes for half an hour. couldn slp at all.
tired t the core. tis week wont be seein her.
didn took panadol for the fever. tis morning it
went away. now its back again. zzz. when is tis
pain and giddyness gona end.. for nth tio fever.
was lyke so fine went out with her ytd t orchard.
and later jus felt sick. wtf. now i noe not euff slp
also will fall sick derh. i dunc ever believe but
maybe now i do lars. zzz. ytd slpt at 2am.
i wonder wat time she slpt. dunc noe what happened
t us last nyte also. sorry narh. so damn worried
you ge mai. u did it everytime. i see liao will fedup.
i'll change for the better narh. wont watch wont do.
promise u lerh yupp. [: i love u much baby.
argh. i'm gonna miss you this whole week. =(

2006-10-18T18:27:00.000+08:00

its so boring today. sigh. alone at home.
no one t talk t really sian one nur.
lols. she's not home too. so shuang go out.
she called and we talked for a while.
not really talked narh. listening t her cousin
talking lols. cute voice huh. but sounds
lyke she's pissed off. lmao. chill he's jus
a kid. hahhas. i had breakfast. but not lunch.
now i dunc noe wat t do on the com. games
are all becoming boring. there's a freaking
mosquitoe in my room. wtf. it jus flew t my ear!
ur going down bitch! lols. tml going moe t work.
ging with kc ds sean larris. sians. wake up early.
tonyte must slp early.. i cant ever slp early.
i'm used t slpin late i wont be able t fall aslp.
sian. den how t work without enuf slp. i'll b tired.
sigh. but only for one day i think i can manage. [:
waiting for her t call me when she's home.
sorry i fan you arh. i noe how ur feelin, really.
but i dunc noe wat else t try and cheer you.
so from now i'll keep quiet until that day is over.
i asked myself if she needed me so much.
things always happen at the wrong time and lead me
thinkin tat she doesnt. even when she said she does..
i dunc even noe t accept tat or not.. lately i'm
not feelin really good. i'm jus down. she duno..
she jus thinks i'm thinkin too much. makin a mess.
ytd went marina square. got scolded by her comin back.
u sounded so pekchek and so fan. how am i suppose t
talk t you and tell you stuffs. i wished i could shut up
and not give u all these shiet tat u gotta take.
its sad. cos u made me think so much because of ur
attitude in the past 4 days. you've nvr been lyke tis
before. u said u wouldn explde. lols. ytd you alrdy did.
so wat can i do. jus keep quiet too. make u happy lyke
u asked me. i'm tryin. but first i gotta be happy too
ryte? the one i loved. tis jus isnt you. once i talk
abt ur studies. the first word i'll hear is aiya ni hen
fan leh. lols. yeah u started the topic. i'm jus tellin
you becasue you asked. when i said the bad thing u didn
lyke. when i said u could do it. u didn lyke it either.
yeah u can say i dunc understand you and how u think.
u think i really dunc noe? tat u started too late.
u struggled thru the whole n lvls exams. now ur scared.
worried u couldn make it t sec 5 with all of us.
scared u lose ur friends? scared you lose me?
and parents and stuffs lyke dat? is it lyke tis?
are u regretting. cos dunc be. u noe if u didn studied
hard tis is the outcome it leads you t be worried.
tats where all the problem came front. u noe u hab
no confidence t you say can be promoted. because u noe
u didn did it well enuf t be sure. we write our own
fate. not god. the rest is up t luck now. chill out.
its over. dunc be afraid t accept ur fate. until tat
day tat comes. you're forced t accept it. theres no
other choice. at this point of time. enjoy while u can
and hope tat everything goes smoothly. i noe u darling.
its hard t jus not think abt it. well u can think and
in tat thinkin process. learn t accept it. not everything
tat happen is bad. everything can be earned back with effort.
love you baby. i'll bring u happiness jus hope you'll be
happy with me. <3

2006-10-16T21:15:00.000+08:00

wats wrong now anyway. lols. its so weird.
u talk lyke i'm not there for u or no one is.
i closed up so many holes. solved and understood.
now ur leaving me things t think abt.
sayin all kinds of weird stuffs tat only u noe.
yeah. only u. why cant i be lyke tis lols.
wouldn it be better. i can think of everything myself.
why are u even wantin t understand me when u urself
cant even understand urself? not even being urself.
unhappy yet wanting t be strong. tired yet wana go on.
has it not already gone t the limit yet? i can see it.
ur alrdy strugglin now. jus a talk and we'll start
quarreling. alrdy shows its really bothering you.
i'm waiting for tat someday when u'll talk t me.
once more i'll say tis t you. dunc fight it if u noe
it hurts so bad. dunc fight it when thinkin abt it
makes you cry and makes me so weak and down and mess up.
cos u noe tats the limit alrdy. it has brought u down
real hard slammed t the ground. even if u are standin
tall lookin fine t everyone. u noe and i noe. ur no okay.
u told me u'll try t be strong. being strong isnt worth
tryin. no one stands strong alone. no one can. if they
could they're lyin t themselves. cos they've alrdy
shed one tear. tat proves it. if ur gona be this way.
its fine with me. i wont mess with you but wait
patiently for u t say it. lyke u said even if u told me
i'll nvr understand? yeah. i'll nvr and u even told me
wats the point den? hahas. t you i may be childish?
so i dunc understand isit? u dunc noe anything dardar.
if tats my perception in u i got nth t say alrdy.
all i noe theres a time for me t be serious i'll be.
if i hab t understand you i'd go the extra mile.
ur alrdy blkin me out now how am i suppose t reach out t u.
how am i going t tell u tat i'd understand if only u told me?
i'd really wana noe. i'm ur stead. make full use of me.
i'm not jus a company. i'm more than everything u can think of.
i can do anything for u. i'll always be hear for u no matter wat.
i noe i've hurt u along the way. and there'll nvr be a full month
tat we wont quarrel. i'll try t prevent tat. we've still got
a long way t go. i hope now its not a time you'd think of stoppin
dunc get sick of quarrelin dunc get sick of me thinkin alot.
i'll tell you wat i'm thinkin. cos we're jus startin out
lyke u said. many things even though we said it we wont be able
t prevent it from happening. i'd compromise. i'd give in.
i'd love. i'd care for you. i wont stop all these. hope u wont.
for some reason u may hate my attitude sometimes.
but i hope u'd noe me well enuff tat i didn did things
intentionally jus t get back at you or hurt you. i'd make it up
i can make a million promises or endless ones. i wont break them.
i told u 10 years down the road wats our outcome? i hope we last
lyke i wanted. and u wanted too ryte? u said it t me. i'll rmb.
u cant tell me not t worry. no matter wat my responsiblities are
there. i'd still worry in some way. tats jus normal okay.
so pls do understand too. tat i'm not wantin t quarrel yar.
Always, mk<3yyan

2006-10-14T22:15:00.000+08:00

today so tired. last nyte slpt at 5.15am.
danny come my house ton den we play games.
we didn ate dinner, so 3.am went down t buy.
saw 2 grps of ppl. left side guai kia. lols.
right side paikia. hahas. bought cup noodles.
went back up cook eat and play game again.
ytd was really fun. and maybe he was boring.
cos i used com most of the time lols. sorry.
we talked crap and laughed so much. hahas.
woke up around 11.20am t go eat kfc. nice!
den after tat went back home. he left at 3+.
geri called and we chatted on the phone.
chat till she went out t cut hair. now i'm bored.
wonder wat she's doing now. having fun now?
she's out again. wished i could go out too.
whole day stay on com and watch 2 hours tv.
eaten spaghetti for dinner. still full now.
miss her rreally much. hope she calls soon.
my cough is back again. its really bad tis time.
the phlegms stuck inside not coming out.
really xin ku. injured my wrist worst tis time.
gona go play game now. slping late again tonyte.
i miss her real bad! =x where'd you go..

2006-10-12T19:22:00.000+08:00

ytd went bugis with her and met up with the rest.
sl, yl, mz, elaine. went bugis street meet them.
ate long john. after tat mz and yi ling smoked outside.
yl offered me. but i said i cant. hhahs. nad for health.
ytd suppose t celebrate 7 month. budden become so mnay ppl.
i sian too. sorry tat i got angry in the morning. hhahs.
i jus wanted er ren shi jie u noe? lols. nbm. its over now.
anyway ytd was still okay barh. =x rushed home with her.
i treasure u alot darling. nvr gona let you go. [:
today woke up 7.15am supose t meet her go swimming.
i fell aslp again. sorry darling. last nyte slpt at 4am.
kinda tired. but still rushed down after tat. hope ur not
angry with me okay. hehs. no matter wat will still come down.
we went tampiness after her swimming. ate there and gaigai.[:
walk around crapped and joked. so funny lar she. so cute lols.
walk around until sian liao den go back cwp walk again.
today drank bbt twice one from tamp and other from cwp.
all nice. lols. after tat i walked her home. den i went home.
really happy tat i'd found u. perhaps i'm blessed. lols. XD
jus wana treat you ryte. dunc wana make u sad. i'm happy now.
hope u are also. the smile on ur face makes me smile with joy.
u make my day. and i'm happy seeing u and enjoy every min of it.
she's eating dinner now i guess. hope she calls me soon.
i miss her. tml going orchard! lols. maybe gp and danny coming.
gnoa eat my dinner soon.. sians. i'm really bored. at home. =x
can we make this last forever? lolx. dear geri ps: I LOVE YOU.

2006-10-12T18:07:00.000+08:00

2006-10-11T10:01:00.000+08:00

YOU GAVE ME SHIET AND U DIDN CARED ABT MY THOUGHTS.
YOU PUT ME THROUGH TIS SHIET. WHEN I TOT IT WAS OVER.
NOW I GOTTA TAKE IT ONCE MORE AND MAKE MY HEART COLDER.
SO TAT IT CANT FEEL, SO TAT IT'LL BE NUMB. SO I COULD TAKE.
I CAN TAKE ALL KINDS OF SHIET. I DIDN WANA CHANGE...
I'M SORRY IF LATELY U THINK I'M DIFFERENT.. COS I CHANGED.
YOU MADE ME CHANGE FOR THE BETTER SO I COULD GO THRU MORE.
FOR NOW I'VE LEARNT T KAN KAI. EVEN THE WORST STUFFS.
DUNC SAY I DUNC CARE ABT UR FEELINS OR EVEN YOU. MUST KAN KAI.
YOU TAUGHT ME. I'D NVR LET ANYMORE PAIN EAT ME ALIVE.
I'VE HAD ENUFF. I'M GONA START CHANGIN MYSELF SO IT WOULDN HURT.
WHEN WILL I BE AS COLD AS AN ANIMAL. I'LL HAVE ENUFF ONE DAY.
UR TRAINING ME T BE TOUGH IS TAT IT? SURE THING I CAN TAKE IT NOW.
NOT GONA QUARREL WITH YOU ANYMORE. DUNC TELL ME SORRY AND U LOVE ME.
COS ITS USELESS. SO PLS SHUT UP WILL YOU? I HAVE MY LIMITS T THE
THINGS U ALWAYS DO T ME. TODAY IS JUS MY LIMITS. I'M NOT GONA DO
THINGS TAT MAKE ME FUCKING GONA REGRET. I'M GONA START MAKING
DECISIONS. IF UR NOT HAPPY WITH IT. DEN I DUNC NOE WAT T SAY.
LEAVE ME? FOR ALL THAT I'VE KNOWN I'VE BEEN CHANGING T FIT IN WITH YOU.
WAT MORE DO U WAN ME T DO. DIE ? U THINK I EVERYTHING ALSO ANYTHING?
U ASK ME MAKE DECISIONS DERH. NOW I DID. LOOK WAT U DID? LMFAO.
YOU THINK ONLY U NOE HOW T SAY? ITS A DARN BIG JOKE. I NOE LAR.
MY PLACE CAN NVR WIN HER! I DUNC WANA HEAR A SINGLE SORRY FROM U.
STOP BUGGING ME. DUNC EVEN WRITE A SINGLE SORRY ON UR BLOG. SORRY SUCKS
SORRY I CAN SAY A MILLION TIMES IT WONT EVEN BRING MY GRANDPA T LIFE.
WAT DOES SORRY HLP IN ANYWAY? CAN I KILL MY GRANDMA AND SAY SORRY?
LOL. ENUFF SAID. I'M NTH... NOW I SEE EVERYTHING THRU... NOTHING AT ALL..

2006-10-09T15:32:00.000+08:00

woke up 9plus. dad and grandma didn went t work.
grandma was sick. dad was sick* lols. sian lar.
dunc noe why angered her. but i'm sorry okay.
hope you ace ur amath and god bless* pls dunc mental blk.
stuck home. played come whole day. tired too.
but nth else t do.. i miss her. i need her.
gona see her tml. hope she msg me soon.
sorry laopo. but dunc go anywhere alone pls.
i'd be worried. kaes. enuff of tat. havent eaten yet..
not hungry anyway jus headache and giddy. eyes aching.
neck pain. woke up on the wrong side of the bed. lols.
tml going with her t swimming. think i'll sit there.
i cant swim if i'm in the water i'd only get in ur way.
rmb-ed u said t me swimming also duno buay paiseh. lols.
today not coming down lerh. i really wanted t.
its too late now. seems lyke i've got lots t say t you.
hmm. tis year maybe no chalet lerh. no more beach hhahs.
chalet... sigh.. some things i tried t forget. useless..
couldn slp much lately. 1 more day and ur exams are over.
i hope u made it. when my hopes turned t fear. it turns
t anger and frustration. i lost trust and i got insecure.
but i've always told myself t take it slowly. maybe tats
jus afew simple steps i should make and downfalls i must
sacrifice t get something i really wanted out of it?
well. still working towards it. lols. guys are immature eh.
2 years immature. hahahs. means i hab a 14yo mind? lol.
ahb u ever hidden stuffs away from me? ryte.. theres no forever.
nth last forever. we do all die. only faster or slower.
lyke u wouldn believe in fairytales. i tell u now i'll always
love u. t you its naive. it'll nvr be true. i'll change.
or in msges. you'd jus type a smiling face. i noe.
u dunc wana hope for anything. jus let nature take its course.
i called ur cell. its off. ur still in exam hall ba.
study hard for one more day. no more stress and fan nao.
we can play com tgt hhahs. [: i injured both my wrist..
my backbone is aching from the injury again.
i'm so broken up. some injuries here and there lols.
how does it feel lyke t be heartbroken. think i've felt it.
is it lyke ur hearts heavy? and a tinkling feelin keeps
circling inside? when ur body jus felt cold and numb?
i hope i get myself ryte. and not always tellin her i'm sad.
wana let her noe i'm happy. i've much t say.. but i prefer
t let it eat me up. my wounds will heal fast.. i'm tiejingang.
hhahs. rmb tat? <3

2006-10-07T16:12:00.000+08:00

ytd had a great time with her. saw her happy and smilin.
happy with her too. hhahs. ytd went tekong t celebrate.
mid autumn festival? lols. sat there. was the only guy.
not really paiseh. but i think i was speechless.
dunc noe how t play with them also lols. girls leh. wth.
she accompanied me go eat kfc. fed up with the counter girl.
dunc noe how t serve give us tat si lang bin like i owe her.
ccb.10pm i sent her home and we walked hand in hand. [:
so fun and memorable. its been long since we lyke tis tgt.
she was so worried abt me lols. dunc noe why. is it 6 sense?
haha. well nth's wrong with me. i only got drunk and injured.
and its the first time me danny and ds drink tgt and crap.
we jus crapped all nyte long lols. bunch of crazy ppl.
lol. dunc noe why i friendly fire on last nyte. ps arh. sorry.
bloody hell danny u also threw tat bottle so hard at my head.
lols. but fun. everyone went back danny house slp over.
she talked t me on the phone for awhile and we chat..
sorry if i mentioned abt it again. how can i get over.
jus lyke how u were b4 now its me whose sayin abt it.
isnt it the same. why u wana get so angry. when u mentioned her.
was i even angry at all? all i wanted was t make you happy.
but inside my i stil got my own thoughts and worries. sadness..
if i could get through t you someday. den you'd noe wat i feel.
those certain point tat u jus gotta control and be strong.
wats the use. when i noe after tat i wouldn be fine at all.
jus wana talk and share and let u understand. didn meant t be angry.
but heck anyways. wats done is done. wats said is said.
wat should i do and how should i do? how can i reach out.
how wil i put it into words? can u spare a thought for me please?
i jus wana drown myself with liqour and forget it jus one day.
wished u'd come t me and ask sometimes. but i noe guys yea..
i dunc need anyone. are you gona leave me alone on tis one too?
lol.... =( dunc wana fan u. i'll kan kai. lyke u wanted. [:

2006-09-24T09:19:00.000+08:00

yawnz~ woke up at 7 plus again. slpt for lyke 6 hours.
later gona study and tonyte going t slp early.
wheres my baby gone t? lols.. are u still aslp?
msged her but got no reply back. guess she is barh.
study study study!! 1 more week. good lucks everyone. [:
laopo. i believe u can do it. yupp. jus chiong with me.
sure can pass derh. dunc stress urself out. must relax k.
no time t waste lerh. jus keep on studyin. dunc use com.
u said u'd control, i trusted u. N's more important.
i think ur more worried and stress than me. u noe wat t do.
u told me we're bound t seperate if we're of different lvl.
but i dunc give a shiet abt tat. i aint gona let tat happen.
even if we're i dunc mind. u promised t stay tgt.
no matter how tough i hope u still would. i love you~ [:
JIAYOU! YYAN, MY ONE AND ONLY STRONG GIRL. <3

2006-09-22T19:58:00.000+08:00

i wished she knew. maybe i'm too straight forward.
sorry. nxt time wont lor. hahas. waiting for dinner..
today darn tired. injuries here and there after pe.
pe had soccer. play until so tired. dunc noe why.
today damn exausted. maybe cos of yesterday mass run.
back t studies again. hope u paid attention t was i say.
and understand fully. dunc forget it okay. important. [:
very tired and slpy but cant fall aslp. things bugging.
while she and alicia was swimming i tried t slp.
but cannot leh. my eyes also closing when i watch her swim.
well. tonyte also not slpin early.. its friday.. 3 am again.
tml going out t meeet her for muvees and go marina square.
hhahs. looking forward t tml!! thanks for the shades laopo!!
i love it alot. [: thank u very much. hehs. tml get urs too!
things hab t be sort out. not everything also must think.
tis got thru t me only today lur. jus understood barh.
wont talk stupid and think stupid. present.. now.. yupps.
sometimes.. i wished she also talk t me deep too.
lyke wat i'm thinkin and all these.. lyke the past.
when we would sit down and talk so much nvrending. lols..
maybe sometimes i wished u'd focus more on me than girls.
hhahs.. everytime u seem more obsessed with them..
and keep askin me tis pretty tat pretty tis fat tat slim.
i jus dunc noe wat t say lerh. keep tellin u same stuffs.
if u take note. its always abt the hair most often.
eversince i been with u everything seem t be in a different
prospective. i see things so differently now. hhahs.
its kinda good barh. now i wont jus think one way. but many.
everytime when online or phone u'll be on com and frenster.
blogs. maybe sometimes i hope u'd talk t me more.
abt something else and not discuss mostly on girls barh.
lol. feel sad sometimes cos i wan talk t you abt stuffs.
i dunc mean all these in a bad way or anything. jus words.
from my heart tat i really felt i should tell you somehow.
hope u understand wat i'm tryin t tell you and not get angry.
i'll say sorry now if u got angry. going t eat dinner now.
i love you..

2006-09-21T19:33:00.000+08:00

back t blog again. i've been really lazy lately.
busy with exams and stuffs too. not much time.
been studyin lil by lil lately. jus browsing up.
hope i could rmb stuffs hope she rmbs easily too.
jiayou laopo. yupp wont say too much on tis.
i noe u dunc lyke. today lookin at you so fan..
i jus dunc noe wat t say. i felt lost also.
sad tat u will lyke tis. pls listen in class.
okay enuff. 1 more week. n lvls only 4 days. lol.
gona hab tuition later and eating dinner soon. [:
so hungry. lately always nvr eat lunch. only dinner.
getting skinner. lols. start t workout again.
daddys back, ask me study again. i noe how u feel darling.
so i wont do the same as him also kaes. i'll remind
myself. try not t fan kaes. and love studyin for now..
keep going. dunc slack for even jus a day. last words t u.
jus wan tell u i'm worried too. dunc wan say too much.
u noe lerh everything tats link t all the worries.
i love u lar. studies is t each its own i guess.
i shouldn even bother. and jus stick t mine first.
jus lyke u told me.. i will.. okay.. but will remind u.
sat going out with her for movies! cant wait for it.
so long nvr watch movie tgt. see u at sch tml yupp.
my bone not pain lerh. heal damn fast hhahs. dunc worry k.
i'm so stupid walk straight nvr see tat dunc noe wat.
starting t miss you. i'll be missing more of you..
after n's i'll miss u worst.. i really wana be with u.
dunc feel lyke letting go. even if theres a difference.
we'll defintely work it out okay. pls. as i wish u would.
i'm going t eat dinner now.. msg u later.
i love you and i mean it. ur perfect, ur jus sweet. [:

2006-09-17T00:14:00.000+08:00

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!!! HAHAHAHAS. THANKS FRIENDS.
THANK ALL THOSE WHO WISHED ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
APPRECIATE EVERYTHING DONE FOR ME. THANKS ALOT.
today woke up early den left house rushing too.
forgot t take my ring!!! our ring!! wth.. sian.
but nbm. she cheered me up. well after awhile =x
i talked t her and cheered her up abit. lols.
tried my best. hope shes happy too. heehs.
thanks everyone who celebrated for me today.
thanks for the prezzies. i love em so much!
hahahs. the shirt the classic. woohoo. and wallet!!
wat more can i ask for? more time t eat cake tgt???
nxt year barh. [: i miss all the good times.
nxt time can everyone stay long abit? ton tgt las.
walked around at orchard tday. ate ljs for lunch.
supposed t watch movie but didn. cos all so late.
so went heeren look for danny clothes. hhahs.
den went far east and saw nice clothe nad new 1,
from newbie. bought a pair of diamond stud for him too.
did u see it? lols. dunc throw the bag away tgt with it.
see properly leh. 7 plus me kc sl and her went home.
danny and gp went t.. uh.. where arh. borders?
den me and her sat down under blk ate drink talk.
9pm she went hhome. i went t buy alcohol. she dunc let.
but i went anyway. i was wanting t hab the taste again.
sorry laopo! i promise u no more alcohol nxxxt time.
sorry t get myself so drunk and smelly. =x i love you.
she brought down ice cream let me eat. thanks thanks.
cos i put my phone in her house t charge. thanks alot too.
can we make this last forever? i wan keep u here forever.
study hard jiayou!!! theres so much t write. but nbm.
i'm giddy and drunk at least i wrote all these first.
cont. tml. [:

2006-09-15T21:27:00.000+08:00

waha. suppose t watch movie but didn catch it.
all because of.. haish dnuc wan say lerh. lols.
went t search for danny's present den went home.
walked her home and on the way say out things.
hhahs. glad tat she understood. jus now so paiseh.
well. i understood something too. zhu jian yar i noe.
today was a wonderful day i can say. and tiring too.
so slpy now. jus now on the way home fell aslp lols.
i'm so loving every momentt spent with her. i love her!
always always, pamper and protect you! lols.
its nvr too much. its always jus nice xp.
only you'll noe wat i'm talking abt yarh. abt the pamper.
well will be waiting for ur call okay! call me soon!
I MISS YYAN`

2006-09-12T21:16:00.000+08:00

today she din went sch. i missed her real bad.
i'm so weak when she's not around. need her.
well.. anyhow think again. made her fedup.
pissed off with myself. i noe my mistakes my flaws.
wanted t kick a curb so damn hard but missed.
in the end i injured my knee. how stupid i'm lols.
nnow the rooms so cold the chills of achings are
running through it. feelin lyke maggots biting.
pain. who cares abt pain. i can take pain.
any pain except heart pain. lols. sorry yupps.
jus now went civic mac eat. saw dexter and his frens.
while dex in washing hands and i was at the counter.
his frene wan disturb her. they left den she told me.
damn i was so pissed off. well talk t him on msn.
he'll hlp clear some stuff up for me so its ok.
i've simmered down alrdy. nxt time i wack liao.
dunc give a fcuk anymore. i wont let guys near you.
UR MINE! ALL MINE! for now.. how abt always? u want?
jus now ur msg left me shaken. shocked. but hey..
i looked on the brightside. i'm sure we'll work
things out little by little somehow. dunc stop.
i wont stop loving you. i'll be here for you.
lyke u said even if dunc get t see each other so
often you'll still love me. likewise. but i'll miss u!
its okay. if we're busy for some reason.
jus hope we'll still remain tgt. let tis love
forever remain in each other's hearts. nvr let go.
i'll hold on so tight til ur hand turns cold.
for all tat i want is jus t remain by ur side.
i love you. hope u noe how much i really do.
so much jus words cant explain it now.
i love you oh so so much laopo!
i'll always treasure and cherish u. always i swear!
let my actions be my words from now on.
let my actions be how i'm going t tell you how much
i love you and willing t do for you. alot is not much.
my actions jus neverending.. hope u'll be happy. <3<3

2006-09-10T13:00:00.000+08:00

2006-09-10T11:47:00.000+08:00

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry
These streets we traveled on will undergo our same lost past

I found you here, now please just stay for a while
I can move on with you around
I hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?
I'd do anything for a smile, holding you 'til our time is done
We both know the day will come, but I don't want to leave you

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry
(a melody, a memory, or just one picture)

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Newborn life replacing all of us, changing this fable we live in
No longer needed here so where do we go?
Will you take a journey tonight, follow me past the walls of death?
But girl, what if there is no eternal life?

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time
But I'm too young to worry
(a melody, a memory, or just one picture)

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over
Trials in life, questions of us existing here
Don't wanna die alone without you here
Please tell me what we have is real

So what if I never hold you, yeah, or kiss your lips again? Whooooah
So I never want to leave you and the memories of us to see
I beg don't leave me

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over
Trials in life, questions of us existing here
Don't wanna die alone without you here
Please tell me what we have is real

(Silence, you lost me-- no chance for one more day)
(Silence, you lost me-- no chance for one more day)
I stand here alone
Falling away from you, no chance to get back home

2006-09-08T23:19:00.000+08:00

sigh.. said things i really didn wanted.
but i still said it anyway. wat if its better?
maybe you'd hab more time. many things i missed.
i wished all i could do was t tell. things i hid.
things i've always wanted but twisted it.
twisted it t make her feel happier and more space.
u noe u really dunc hab t sacrifice anything for me.
love u babe.
missing geri.

2006-09-07T19:31:00.000+08:00

say it isnt so. say it is a lie. i'll believe in u..
after wat u've said. maybe i jus tot abt things.
whats better for you? can things be lyke it is now?
can studies and future be mixed tgt with us now?
can we sustain. how would it be? keep it tis way?
i hope it wont make much of a difference. :/
i still wish we'd still be able t maintain things.
no matter how tough it is. hope we can. cont..
being tgt.. for as long as always..
well. i hope its still wat u want..
still wan u t need me lyke i do..
still wan u t say u'd hold on tight..
still wan u t be the person i miss..
still wan feel important t you only..
still wan feel ur care and love for me..
still still still still still still....
nvrending.. -i hope i made a difference in u..

2006-09-07T13:32:00.000+08:00

how the hell am suppose t pass by tday and tml?
its so bored with no one around at home. feel alone.
this feeling sux. lyke no one can hear u. going nuts.
talking t myself and talking t the air. lols. wth.
i miss her. hope sat will come soon. miss her dearly.
may we last for always. i wished, i hoped, i prayed.
whats meant t be will always be urs. i jus hope we're.
well. forget tat. now everythings so fine. i'm happy.
changed many habits. understood many problems. well...
i love you. nths gona change tat. i'll miss you!! (=
come t me baby. i need you. <3

2006-09-06T10:15:00.000+08:00

maybe things had a big change now.
dunc noe wat ur blog meant also.
many things ur not telling me.
i noe u wan quiet, silence and peace?
only happiness and not sayin out wats inside?
u can counsel urself. lols. but i cant.
u can dunc say out. counsel and ur fine.
can i? i'll try. everythings reality.
words last nyte. i said it cos i felt it.
nvr tot it made us both angry and fan?
letting u noe how i feel is all tat i can.
seems lyke when u noe how i feel ur fan?
didn wana blame myself. u noe i wan u happy.
i wont think lerh. lyke u said all i knew..
yeah i knew. i felt. so i jus tried tellin u.
i should jus learn anger management den talk t you.
den we could at least talk things out nicely.
not having t quarrel lyke u said we only got quarrel.
can u understand me too? i dunc noe if things alrite.
i tot we both should understand each other. yes? no?
why always say i dunc understand u leh.. how abt me?
i didn demanded things. neither i wanted a quarrel.
i've always jus wanted t tell you things. tats all.
wat i say is not for u t go think and make a fuss.
its for u t understand and noe tat i hab tis feelin.
jus for u t understand... i love you.. =(

2006-09-03T18:09:00.000+08:00

yawnz* so tired and slpy. today study abit.
so fast tml mt N's exams. sigh. so boring..
studyin for ss. promised her i will go study.
woke up at 5.09am tis morning dunc noe why.
jumped out of bed drank water and slpt back.
slpt till 8 plus den wake up play com. lols.
msged her. didn noe she woke up alrdy. hhas.
she's slpin now. tonyte not callin me lerh.
cos she's gona slp early and study. jiayou!!
today jus cut hair. dunc noe if its nice. lols.
but who cares. its only for her and myself t see.
today did work out. now i'm kinda restless.
slpy lerh. gona eat my dinner soon den study.
all the best t everyones MT N's tml. GOODLUCK~
blog again some other time. (:
I look into ur eyes and i see everything i need. <3

2006-09-02T20:38:00.000+08:00

today is such a wonderful day. lols. happy!
reminiscing the days spent with her. (:
happy t have her. cherishing and treasuring us.
i miss her. today studied math. going t read ss.
hope both of us go up t sec 5. tats my wish.
today did work out. not so much jus 12 reps.
i wan achieve a V tat would be so nice lars.
now got abit. at tis rate i think 2 months?
from tday onwards gona stuf myself with meat.
more meat more veg. more protein more carbo!
i wan grow taller also. 1.80 is enuf lols.
now only 1.70 i think. wah 10 cm... 3 years??
hope i suddenly got outburst of growth. lols.
jus finished bathing plus vacuumin my room.
nxt time she come den wont so dusty lerh. hahs.
after vacuumin i keep sneezing damn. so much dust.
block nose now. tml tuition at 12.30. done hw.
monday mt N lvls. i hope i can tyco pass? hahahas.
but i noe tats kinda impossible lars.. praypray~
becuz i nvr study and not going t. tired lerh.
sorry mdm ang. eversince sec 4 start i slack ler.
didn feel lyke listening or doing hw. so sorry.
gonna go study ss soon. must pia i dunc wan ite.
go poly den my dad wont control me. yupps.
everything is planned. now i must work hard. (:
i wan take care of her, gonna work hard for us too.
stand by me and support me okay? i need you much!
i love you laopo. heehs. so deeply in love wit u!
I LOVE GERI AND IT GOES ON FOR ALWAYS. . . . . . <3

2006-09-01T20:57:00.000+08:00

i'm so lazy t blog lars... lols.. tired and slpy.
since u personally asked me t so i blog. heehs xp
today woke up ed 7.40am. last nyte slpt 3 plus.
was waiting for game t start den go lie on bed.
lie halfway i fell aslp. lols. wtf. so lousy.
woke up straight away use com lerhs. nth t do.
waited for her t come. did extreme workout.
after tat went t bath. den cooked cambel soup.
yummy~ too bad she dunc lyke.. if not i gib her.
she reach around 11.20. i cooked maggie mee for her.
tuition teacher was late so we jus relax and wait.
after he came at 12.40. she waited in the room.
sorry t keep you waiting norhs. knew u were bored.
nxt time i cancel tuition pei you okays. sorry.
after tuition finish went t play with her. lols.
she was lyke bored until.. she looked so sian liao.
after tat went toa payoh t eat steak. so EX so FAT.
but was quite nice larhs. lol. nt bad. jus got fats.
later accompanied her home. we both stomach ache.
ate too much lerhs. she worst than me. lols.
hope she's better now. ((: i miss her.. i'm bored.
dunc noe wat t do later. lols. cs? dota? study?
hhahs. i love geri so much!! <3

2006-08-31T20:13:00.000+08:00

happy teacher's day. sch today was darn boring.
but the ice cream was nice. thanks principal.
nice of you. today after sch she came my house.
she's so cute lur. and so paiseh hahas.
saw my mum and grandma and said hi.
abt 4.30 we left. accompanied her home and back.
we ate food from the night market at cwp.
walked t vista and bought drinks and her dessert.
and u left me missing u.. love ur huggs darling <3

2006-08-28T18:40:00.000+08:00

well. this week onwards will go home early.
she planned it. prepare for n lvls ryte. ha.
now its jus chiong and chiong barh. i hoped. =x
today kinda tired. last nyte didn slp well.
i think i gotta cut down on all these.
bad for us bad for my brain too.
sorry for being frustrated in class today.
dunc noe why i had alot of anger inside me.
i've let it all out now. i'm fine.
i miss you geri! i wished the path was clear.
i hoped from now onwards we can solve probs.
i hope i can be the one stopin her from changin.
i stared at the sky today norhs. and asked myself.
if tis is really wat i wanted den why worry.
its not lyke everythings so bad tat she's gone.
all i wanted was her by my side. nth else norhs.
want her t stay the same tat good and strong girl.
the one i'd fallen in love deeply with.
den i told myself. if i really had made a diff.
den maybe she'd still listen t wat i say.
i missed us the happy us. the carefree us.
the nth t worry abt thinkin. the crazy in love feel.
missed ur lips. those kisses tat made me go high.
its been gone for so long. hhahs, wana feel again.
i love her so much. her hugs tat made me warm.
those feelin she always left me missin when shes gone...
i missed them so much. come back soon.
kit.yyanyan. <3

2006-08-26T15:12:00.000+08:00

sweat drips in my eyes
screams of lust we cry
tonight you are everything to me
you're everything...
you're everything to me no more
as I wake from this perfect dream
I'll escape from Eden's walls
can I not stay and live this lie?
go away and I'll think only of myself

and to think that you will not be scared or surprised if I'd severed all these ties
this is the end...

I'll lose myself in anguish for tonight
help me get over you
one last false apology
help me get over you

I feel so numb to see this bitter end of beautiful illusions...would this be the same?
broken pieces will not mend to save our past now...go away...

I'll lose myself in anguish for tonight
help me get over you
one last false apology
help me get over you

now we must let go
urgency overwhelms me as I must restrain my flood of tears
I refuse to be slave to your false beauty again

I'll lose myself in anguish for tonight
help me get over you
one last false apology
help me get over you

2006-08-24T19:10:00.000+08:00

lately i'm tired and all. cant slp much.
maybe think too much abt studies and games.
us too. yupps alot barhs. alot has happened.
we've gone through almost everything.
solved alot. feelin more relaxed and happy. (:
loved her so much. sorry abt jus now too.
i sweared and i promised lerhs. i'll change.
hab faith in me yarhs! hehs. ytd watch the breakup.
the show not bad. touching and funny. lols.
budden ending was unpredictable. yups.
went for remedial jus now was tired.
prelims result quite okay. so far failed 2.
mt and combine humans. today darn slpy.
the medicine keep makin me wana slp.
keeps getting stucked in my throat too. lols.
worried abt her studies. hope she works hard.
dunc easily demoralised and give up.
i'll put in everything for u and hlp you okay.
jus gotta listen t me barhs. i hoped. =X
I'm gonna miss her again... <3

2006-08-20T01:44:00.000+08:00

I had no regrets loving u geri. past is gone.
its a whole new chapter and a brand new me.
u made me smile u brought me laughter.
most importantly u loved me lyke i love you.
well i'm not asking much jus for u t stop.
because the one hurting most is you not me.
you noe it urself. i'm hurt cos ur hurt.
everyday i fear tis prob would surface.
nvr thought tat it did again. bury it soon.
be lyke how we were, happy and loving.
i dunc lyke tis. especially wat happened.
i still habben slp hab you? i'm really tired.
tired t explain t you and quarreling.
i'll only be patient with you and tell you.
my feelings are true. my consicence clear.
the lady i love is no other GERI LEE YIN YAN.
no one else. and its nvr ever gona change.
not unless u change tat. i love you babe.
i noe u wont slp well tonyte. anyhow think agn.
not good for ur brain. i understand ur feelins.
are u insecure? from all ur sayin it seems..
i assured u countless times. i'll always do.
dunc care how dunc care when dunc care why.
once in a while i'll still say something t u.
in this world problems only come if u mix them.
mix them with ur personal affairs which is us.
we're perfectly okay. i love u, u love me.
hey whats wrong anyways. lols. jus our luck.
i cried when i called ur cellphone. i cared.
i loved. i dunc wan u t sad. neither i wan sad.
things u said u promise nvr t say. but u did.
make forever an outstanding word lyke u promised.
everything u did for me i'm so happy. do u noe?
can u see? do u feel my happiness. i love u.
no loneliness anymore. cos ur here by my side.
u said u'll be here. as i can see it u are.
even though so near yet so far. we're still close.
dunc tell me i'll be happy. cos now its enuf.
dunc say ur not good. i always said u were.
understand wat i say and accept. i need u darlin.
stay with me. dunc be sad. dunc be jealous.
if ur insecure. i'll make u feel secure over time.
i'll make everyone see no one else comes close.
no one else comes close between u and me. i wont let!
i swear! neither will i break free from out bond.
its so strong alrdy. dunc break it. stay there.
its safe. i'll protect you from harm and fears.
tell me what are ur fears. tell me ur sorrows.
i'll understand them. i'll mend them. i take it away.
i mend ur heart back. make u happy and smiling again.
u noe i'll always stay with you no matter what.
i've always wanted t. no matter what u say. u noe derhs.
i'm not those who change my mind once i noe wat i want.
I WANT YOU GERI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'VE ALWAYS WANTED YOU. SINCE WHEN I WANA LEAVE YOU! (:
I'LL DIE SO REGRETFULLY IF I WERE T LET U SLIP AWAY.
I LOVE YOU. COS I NOE YOU'LL LOVE ME TOO.
I SWEAR BEFORE GOD. I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU. ALWAYS.
I REALLY HOPE YOU'LL BE HAPPY WITH ME. ITS US-
NVR BEEN ANYONE ELSE BUT U U U U U U U U U .
I MISS YOU DARLING. MISS UR HUGS AND KISSES.
WEARING THE JACKET U WORE IN MY HOUSE THE OTHER DAY.
STILL FEEL UR WARMTH INSIDE. UR SMELL. UR LOVE.
U TOUCHED MY HEART COUNTLESS TIMES WITH WORDS.
THINGS U DID FOR ME U REALLY SACRIFICED. THANK YOU!
I REALLY APPRECIATE THINGS U DID. THANKS SO MUCH!
I NVR TOOK THINGS FOR GRANTED. ITS BAD. I NOE IT.
I TREASURE YOU SO MUCH I CHERISH I CARED ALOT ALOT!
I SO EASILY GAN JJIONG AND WORRIED ABT YOU.
IF U JUS GONE FOR A FEW MINS I'D WORRY LIKE KISIAO.
ALL THESE I'M SURE U NOE DERHS. I DO CARE ALOT.
ESPECIALLY FOR UR SAFETY. WHEN UR ALONE.
WE'RE ALRDY TGT. UR WEARING MY RING!!! HHAHS.
KEEP IT TAT WAY AND WEAR IT ALWAYS OKAY!
6 MONTHS SOON LERHS. I SO LOVE YOU DARLING!!!!
6 MONTHS MEANS HALF A YEAR! I'M BLESSED T HAB U!
I WAN WORK WITH U IN HOLIS. COOK MEE WITH YOU.
EAT WITH U. CUDDLE EACH OTHER AND GIVIN KISSES.
HUGGIN EACH OTHER SO TIGHT AND SPIN ROUND N ROUND.
BEING SO HAPPY ABT A BRAND NEW DAY AND SEEING YOU.
THE THINGS WE'VE DID. SO MUCH. SO FUN. TREASURED-
THE MOMENT I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU. I DIDN STOP.
ONLY WHEN I SAW THINGS DAT SADDENED ME.
SEE U LEAVING IN THE CAB. I LOST MY ONLY CHANCE.
T TELL YOU HOW I FEEL ABT YOU DURING CHALET.
SEE YOU WITH HIM PATCH BROKE ME APART.
YET I CARRIED ON. AFTER U LEFT I TOLD MYSELF.
SHES GONE ITS OVER. GIVE UP. SHE'LL NVR BE URS.
BUT YET. AFTER HOLIS UNTIL SCH REOPEN I STILL LOVED.
NOT NOEING IT. BUT SEE THINGS U DID WITH OTHERS.
I GOT JEALOUS. I CANT STOP LOOKIN AT UR BEAUTIFUL EYES.
CANT STOP NOT WANTIN T SIT WITH YOU. CONTROLLED!!
ALL THESE U DUNC NOE. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
IF ONLY I COULD MAKE U UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.
DEN U WOULD STOP PUSHING ME AWAY LERHS...
I LOVE U DARLING GERI. UNDERSTNAD.

2006-08-19T10:18:00.000+08:00

If asked why I love her I would say
It's the sway in her hips,
the thickness in her thighs.
It's the lust in her lips,
the love in her eyes.
It's the softness of her skin,
the silk in her hair.
It's the way that she walks;
it's the sweetness in her talk.
It's the way she loves me
that makes me love her each day.
That is what I would say.

2006-08-18T19:48:00.000+08:00

jus got back. i'm tired. i miss her.
lately it jus sucks. fcuk everything.
fighting for love tats jus great.
wat t think and wat t say anymore.
i jus dunc noe eh. feel empty.
words dunc come out right. sigh.
someday i'll try t make u unds.
i dunc noe who u are. what u are.
how u treat me, and in wat way.
i only noe one thing.. u noe..
maybe i still haben understand you.
cos everthing seems t link up.
)=)=)=

glad.

2006-08-13T12:08:00.000+08:00

hello hello! lols. jus finished breakfast cum lunch.
i miss her so much. lols. glad t see her study.
happy t noe tat u'll listen t wat i've said t you.
i noe its kinda tough. well. even i feel tat too.
but i'm still studyin hard yeah. i'll go study with u.
we've talked alot yesterday. abt now and nxt time.
hmms. cant hide my feelings and tell u tat i'm not sad.
maybe i'm jus worried. but lyke i said no matter wat.
i'll always stay by ur side. nvr leaving you.
i promise you! <3 no more broken promises. yupps.
trust me and stay by my side too. nvr wan u t leave.
i love u darling. i'm crazier abt u each day. hhas.
i hope'd forever isnt jus a word for u and me.
i'll always stay with u and protect u kaes.
i'm off t studies now! I MISS YOU SO... STAY...

my hands numb.

2006-08-11T19:13:00.000+08:00

hmms. jus got home. around 6 plus. came home jiu chat.
she's sad. even if u are i noe u'd stil lbe happy(=
kinda worried abt her too. because she hates being scolded.
either she'll run away or she'll cry cos of someone loved.
i understand kaes. so tell me whenever u need me.
anything at all i'll do for u derhs.
jus now came back whole left hand became numb now my arm too.
its sort of lyke stroke. lols. i cant control it.
its so heavy i can hardly lift it. imagine this kaes.
i'm carryin a car with my arm. tats how it feels. scared..
i can barely type a msg and type on the keyboard.
only my right hand and arm is fine. i wonder why.
well alrdy told my mum. later gonna tell dad.
he's once a stroke patient guess he'll noe something.
stroke has been running in my family line. so...
if i get stroke den.. too bad for me. but no matter wat.
i wont let anything happen t me. cos she needs me. ha!
whose gonna protect you if i'm not around?
even on the verge of erhems* i'll still hang on.
you'll always be the first person t noe everything.
jus now i also told u first. so dunc worry kaes.
tday after sch nth much. walked her home.
den went swimming with her and ah boi.
i didn swim jus sat there. watched slpt. slacked.
was really boring larhs!!! lols. and no time...
she gotta go home early den. for dinner.
5.22 i went home. hugged and kisses. [:
missed her larhs. tis week like no see her often.
only jus awhile. in sch also nvr talk t her.
felt lyke not much time tgt. well study hard kaes!
i'll study with u norhs. buck up! work hard!
i wan go up with u nxt year! dunc slack lerhs.
no time no time~~!! ha.. my back aches are back again.
my fractured bone still haven okay. been 2 weeks.
aiyo. wth is wrong with me so many symtoms.
am i dying? hahaha. choy! touch wood touch wood!!!
hao derhs end here.
I LOVE YOU YAN!

2006-08-11T19:10:00.000+08:00

Despite myself
I make the most of this long sleepless night
To jot down these lines
We say that the heart has its reasons,
That reason doesn't always understand
I hope mine isn't lost
I will have needed time to understand
To write to help me come out of this mist
To know how to find the right words
Even though I'm aware that you won't read them
But I know you are here !
I feel your gaze turn on me,
But what does it matter ?
I have to empty my mind, make my heart cry
What could I have done to help you ?
I would have covered you with my skin
If I had been able to remove it...
Just to warm up you
In your shaking arms, I would have rolled off my strength
So that you might defend yourself
Pierced by pain
Your body would have passed through mine
And we would have shared it
But now, I have to relearn to live... Whithout you
Afflicted by much sorrow
I try to cross life...
To have been able to write all these thoughts
Which obsess and torment me,
Relieves my conscience
I only have to forget everything,
Start anew
And give my life a new meaning...

2006-08-10T19:15:00.000+08:00

straylight run

2006-08-08T23:23:00.000+08:00

The Perfect Ending.

Taken in context
It's not a bad thing
But when you start to pick it apart
It gets so depressing
It's that sort of thing
That makes you think too much
It's that sort of thing
That makes you lose your objectivity

So, if you made it
Just be glad that you did and stay there
If you ever feel loved or needed
Remember that you're one of the lucky ones
And if it's over
Just remember what I told you
It was bound to happen
So, just keep moving on
There's no perfect endings

You peel back the layers
And get down to the inside
But sometimes you lose sight
Of what it was you were trying to find
And it's that sort of thing
That makes you think too much
It's that sort of thing
That makes you lose your objectivity

So, if you made it
Just be glad that you did and stay there
If you ever feel loved or needed
Remember that you're one of the lucky ones
And if it's over
Just remember what I told you
It was bound to happen
So, just keep moving on
There's no perfect endings
No perfect endings

missing her.

2006-08-06T12:38:00.000+08:00

its been long since i blogged huhs. (= i'm back again.
really tired and lazy past few days. no time t blog.
tuition and more tuition coming up. this month is hell.
faster end. i wana relax i dunc wan tuition alrdy!!
everytime need rush home. but of cos must study.
i'm studyin really hard alrdy larhs. i wan go sec 5!!
she's starting t study too. i wan her go up with me.
keep pushin her lorhs. sometimes only hhahs. cant often.
she'll find it irritating. heehs. will you be here?
or will i be alone? you nvr noe tomorrow.
if i fall down will you hlp me carry on? <3
nth much t blog. tuition on monday thurs sat weds.
fcuk larhs. all tuition on chemistry. pengz...
lols. anyways. must work hard. (= cant stop.
alrites i'm going t go study now. jiayou darling!
after tis year most things will be easy for us.
u noe wat i mean yarhs, i love you. ((=

wat t do wat t do.

2006-07-29T09:56:00.000+08:00

woke up at 8.30. last nyte online until 1 am.
still not enuff slp. everyday cant slp properly.
every morning wake up back ache. lousy bed. lols.
gona change soon. mummy say wan buy hahas. yeah!
later tuition at 12.30. i jus chiong finish maths.
nth t do. cs dota cartoon and same thing over again.
so bored liao on com. no purpose anymore.
only chat with her is my main purpose for using it.
hhahs. love her so much. hope shes happy with me.
i hope this thought is only jus a thought.
love u loads darling. <3 i cherish and treasure us.

who am i?

2006-07-28T21:46:00.000+08:00

jus bathed. its been awhile since i blogged. (=
past few days were studies and more studies.
slacked abit in the middle but still studied.
today went tampiness with her after sch. hahs.
was very happy talkin and laughing all the way.
lols. look at girls and guys. dressing and all.
lols. first time lyke tis. i dunc go shoppin.
but she changed me. now i got lots t buy hahas.
first time i shopped with a girl barhs. heehs.
many first times larhs. last tyme was too naive.
learnt alot from this relationship. thanks alot.
the good and the bad. both alike. it changed me.
well. i'm happy jus t hab u around me. felt glad.
nowadays got think abit. abt us and us still..
i didn wana talk abt it. cos u told me not to think.
i wil try not to. well. i fear and i'm afraid.
of losing you. and afraid u'll change too.
yarhs ppl change. i noe tat. who doesnt?? hhahs.
its jus tat relationships. it would be bad. wun it?
okay skip skip skip. i jus wana be happy.
live everyday t the fullest cos u dunc noe,
if tml would come for us or not. hope it does.
maybe i've got too much t say. its hard t type it.
maybe someday i'll tell you everything inside me.
i love you darling yan. maybe its jus me... <3<3

woppies

2006-07-23T11:35:00.000+08:00

sians. ppl drilling upstairs so fcukin noisy.
woke up at 8 plus and went back t sleep.
was really tired. lols. more slp better.
hope shes really feeling better. get well yarhs.
hhahs. if not i cannot disturb u norhs. how eh.
lols. jkjk. i miss those days when we sat n talk.
sharing everything in mind and talk abt anything.
now its still the same i guess. but seldom..
i miss you darling. tml we go watch movie! ahas.
sorry i got angry and scolded you and nagged u.
lyke old man huhs. lols. hope u understand jiu hao.
see ya tml blog lter. love ya laopo. <3

sada

2006-07-22T18:05:00.000+08:00

whole day watch sorry i love you. very nice.
after my tuition. became bored and missed her.
i trust you narhs. now not the time t talk.
i'll always rmb wat u said. you will. hahs.
hope tonyte you'll talk t me norhs.
i decided not t think and try not nagging.
its not so bad. but i'll still be worried.
but i wont anyhow think lerhs alrite.
stay with me always larhs.
i dunc wana fcuking care the outcome anymore.
i'll keep on reminding. at least i remind.
we'll both be fine and happy tgt. i hope.
i dunc wan quarrels no more. jus simple talks.
talking sense and getting things on track.
tats all i want. all i cared for is you.
im happy with you. i'm not letting go.
not anymore. dunc wan lose anyone anymore.
i so treasured u alrdy. i was once a shadow.
now i'm not anymore! dunc wanna lose you!
FCUK YOU FAMILY. FCUK YOU DAD. FCUK YOU MUM.
FCUK MYSELF UP!! FCUK MY LIFE. LOLS.

i noe ur tired too.

2006-07-22T09:42:00.000+08:00

woke up at 9. nth t do.. tired inside and stuffs.
sorry i scolded u, sorry i nagged, sorry okays.
u can manage on ur own. do it for urself not me.
dunc regret nxt time. haish.. its hard t say tis.
i dunc wana talk t you abt all these too.
you said u will i hope u jus would. sad t see tis.
pamper you isnt the whole point anymore.
i tot maybe you'd still listen barhs. but u played.
dunc care where and when. ur the playful type.
lyke mr justin said i was happy go lucky.
bo chap in everything. yeah great. i'm now.
lyke i didn noe wats more important and wats not.
counting down days. til the n's or till the end...
)= if one of us fall. its taking one piece of me.
after tis post. i'm gona let you go alrdy.
as in.. u can do watever u wan anymore.
dunc hab t tell me if u dunc want to.
u didn wana talk abt anything anymore.
my face wont hab an expression.
theres hole in there which only you can mend.
but i cant see anymore. u jus didn cared.

i'm the cause of everything.

2006-07-21T20:17:00.000+08:00

Haish. sian norhs. wth. i'm only makin u fan.
i cant do anything, i think i said enuf.
worst is tat u've heard enuf. i dunc wan u sians.
for once i told myself i'll nvr mess with u.
dunc bother abt wat u wana do. but i cant.
i noe u also wont 1 narhs. u no mood lerhs.
the more i say the more u wont do ryte?
my words has became pointless alrdy norhs.
i also dunc understand u barhs. is it true?
cos i dunc noe wat u wan. wat u thinking.
do wat u wan do. talk t ur friends and all.
i feel lyke i'm talkin bullshiet.
i feel lyke i'm a stupid fool tellin u all these.
when u jus listened and hardly would do anything.
i'm letting all the worries turn into anger now.
i wished i dunc hab t fan u. but i'm so sorry.
i'll try stop norhs. its darn hard larhs.
but i think i can, gimme some time okay.
i'm going t bath. call me later barhs.
i guess you'd be fine with ur own thinking.
i wished u said things tat u mean.
6 days. its not important anymore.
i mean come on larhs. dunc say u will.
dunc say it and dunc do it. i'm tired too.
ur more tired. lols. sorry arhs.
dunc say u will jus t assure me norhs.
u noe i wont be assured.
lyke u asked me t go see doc. i said i would.
i didn wan u t worry. is it the same as u?
is tat wat ur doing t me? lols.
i'm sorry if i suck norh. sorry cant understand u.
be happy and i'll be fine. i'll try.
when its dead and cold. i'll be fine. <3

cant slp again.

2006-07-20T23:48:00.000+08:00

here i'm worrying. cant get t slp again. sigh.
darlin.. i'm tryin my best is it so hard?
i hope i'm not giving u so much things t think.
i dunc wan lidat norhs everytime u sad cos of me.
the past is gone now everything is a new start.
you and me are a new beginning new chapter.
jus lyke u said t me when you accepted me.
its ur decision i hope u dunc regret. i didn.
i love u narhs. so i wanted u t study. i did too.
can dunc play com and chat so much, jus awhile?
is it so bad.. i'm really worried abt you and us.
wat more can i say. i jus keep repeating rmb t study.
u said u will. or u said hao derhs. lols. but.. sigh.
sad t hear u didn whenever u said u will. i'm sad..
u even promised t study for us norhs. wats affectin.
outside friends? or seeing ppl who alrdy not studyin?
wats important wats not. pls prioritise can marhs.
dunc play com so much pls pls. for once jus listen pls?
i only pls u narhs. its the only one thing i wanted.
nth else is more important than u and us can anot.
i dunc wana see us fall apart jus cos of this things.
i dunc lyke. dunc make empty promises. wat do u wan?
tell me exactly whether wat i'm doing is worth doing.
sometimes i think it does. sometimes i dunc think so.
i feel lyke i need t let u go. maybe things changed.
i feel lyke i'm pullin too tight and i needa loosen up.
u need space too. wat more can i do? jus study will do.
its enuf for me. i hope u will.. i worry all the time.
i cant slp now. so i woke up t blog. tonyte its hard.
its been hard talkin t you. sorrys dunc hlp anymore.
do it and i'll feel better. assure me pls. will you?
we talked over the fone on the train. u said u will nors.
now wat happened. i only get sorry. is tat all? wat more.
if one simple sorry can stop me from worryin.
it could stop all the problems in the world.
sorry is jus not cut out for me. not for you too.
the more we say it. the deeper the wounds in my heart.
the more u say it the sadder i get it leaves a mark.
an impression in my heart. tat ur givin it all up.
when all i wanted was for things t go smooth.
make it up t sec 5 and we could take it slow from there.
i've tot of wantin t be with u i really had.
but ur not givin me a chance t at least make it right.
i'm puttin things back on track, but the same thing happens.
always studys and my past. maybe i over did it.
if u would tell me i'd change and stop all of it.
my heart here is for u t torture and t love.
i felt it was all so right alrdy. but its been days.
u keep sayin u will, but ending up apologising. =/
if i had time i'd tell u how i feel abt everything.
everything and all the things i've said and did.
i hab my intentions. i laid the pathway. pls walk withme.
i hope i'm not alone. ur not on the ryte path.
take mine will you? dunc assure me for nth. it pains.
if all i could do was jus watch u fall.
i'd rather fall first and catch u at the end of ur fall.
hopin tat u'll rise up again. and bring me up too.
because ur the one tat made a difference in me.
changed me and made me. i feel happier. i feel ur love.
i love it. everything abt you. no matter wat u say.
wat happens in the end i'll always be there t hold you.
tightly always till the end. <3

2006-07-16T09:24:00.000+08:00

Woke up around 8 plus. i couldn slp. last nyte drink wine till seh..
I guess i'm better now.. dunc worry yarhs. its a so peaceful now.
I dunc wana think and break this peace. anyway it isnt so bad.
Dunc blame urself neither. we've got much t do and concentrate.
It'll get better once everything is over. after exams barhs. lols.
I'm gona pia hard too. i dunc wana regret not doing it. so tired.
I noe if i dunc pia, everything we did and said would mean nth alrdy.
So u must also do it too yeahs. (= lols.. i've forgotton last nyte.
At least for now. its better than havin t think abt it all the time.
I promise i'll tell you everything derhs okay. i jus need some time.
i've been havin some trouble slping.. kept thinkin abt wat u said.
In the end i told myself after all tat we've done for each other,
Can we really not trust each other?? i still trust you. dunc scared.
Wats hab t be said i alrdy told u last nyte. the rest i'll tell u soon.
Wait till i get things clear okay. later got tuition at 2.30pm. tired.
Gona work hard. now i really understand no money cant survive at all.
All the while i tot no money nbm. i still can live. cos its not mine.
But now come t think of it. if its mine i wont even hab enuff at all.
So many ppl tried t talk t me, even my tuition teacher lols. glad.
But some still doesnt gets into my head. but i'm sure wat i wana do.
Dunc worry its for a good cause. alrite get back t yesterday..
Yesterday went t jurong point and watched re-cycle. darn nice and touchin!
lols. she cried in the cinema lols i felt the ghost was funny. hahaas.
They became 3d at the ending lols. den i laughed non-stop. hahas.
after tat we went t fareast and heeren. went fareast buy her hairband.
hope she lykes it barhs. hhahas. umms den went back cwp and she ate dinner.
Last n yte i didn had dinner, drank on an empty stomach lols. haish..
Reached her blk downstairs abt 8.11pm. slack and talk downstairs. imissus.
8.26pm i sent her home den i went home. i was moody. so msged her.
And there goes i told her everything. i only miss us all these while.
Everythings changed has it not?? =(

happy yet sad.

2006-07-15T10:17:00.000+08:00

Hhahs. yesterday was really fun. went swimming wit her. (=
First time i went swimming with a girl narhs. at first weird.
Alicia and siew lin sister was there too. lols. so noisy. lols.
But she was kinda cute though. (= lols. always suan geri. hhahs!
Later jiu get used norhs. i cant swim properly narhs. lol.
Swim until about 5 jiu left lerhs. after tat went atmiralty.
Saw graduate derh hafiz. den went t buy her white fungus. lols.
After tat i walked her home. chit chat and played whole day.
Physics test sure fail norhs. forgot everything larhs. darn it.
Quarreled with dad. lols. started this year only. feelin bad.
But nbm. she still made me feel better and understood stuffs.
Thanks for listening laopo. thanks for jus being there for me.
I'm happy at least i got u t cheer me up. i'll do likewise too.
during pe ytd we played soccer. hhahs. so fun norhs. i scored 7.
So long nvr play lerhs. we were lyke super united class larhs.
Lols. 4n1 always united! hahahs. lyke u said friendship soccer.
Going out t meet her at 12 pm. watching movie at boon lay. ((=
I'm gona go study now and den going t bath. and prepare t leave.
I'm happy tat i've got parents as well as you. glad t hab you.
yan.. i duno wat i'll do without you.. i need you so bad. <3
Maybe sometimes i jus wished i'm still stayin at 640. lols.
Den i can jus go see u anytime when i miss you so bad. hahas.
I love you so much. i trust you, i'll always do. rest assured.
I wont hab doubts anymore. not for now. let bygones be bygones.
Theres a better future t think of than the past. days hab been hectic.
I hope i can feel better soon. sorry t let you worry always.
But no matter wat u'll be the first one t know okays. (((=
I understand u meant well sayin those stuffs. i jus cant do it.
Let everything move on its own narhs. i'll make things ryte soon.
Ur the first person tat ever made me feel ryte again.
Thanks for bringin me out of this shell once again. hope ur happy too.
Hope u feel my love and all the things i'm doing for you is true.
Hope ur happiness lies with me. i hope t be ur last love.
<3<3<3

hahaha.

2006-07-13T17:34:00.000+08:00

Today morning duno why i still walked t her blk. lols
I knew she wouldn be going yet i still walk there.
Now i only take that route t sch. i duno any other route.
Lols. i'm used t it alrdy. lost whenever ur not around.
Today whole day i was slpy cos i didn slp well. =x
Its bored in sch too. missed her. one day seems so long.
Nbm. tml morning get t see her again. wana hug her lols.
Shes calling me tonyte too. will be waiting for her call. ((=
Thought abt wats gona happen t us nxt time. need lots of trust.
Dunc worry i'll give you lots of space. i love you baobeii.
Think abt many stuffs larhs. but told her i wont think.
As i promised u i didn think after i left ur block. so boring.
After sch went t buy bbt for her. went her house gib her.
Stood outside her gate and talked t her. chatted till 4.
I left after tat. feeling bored. lonely i guess. hhahs.
Well. its not too long a day least i get t see her. heehs.
I promise i'll study. she promised me too. i hope barhs.
Must study hard norhs dunc slack so much anymore.
Com okay lerhs, dunc stuck there den nvr study okays.
Rmb t study norhs. theres nth much i can do if u dunc..
I'm watchin as the day goes by. got demoralised tday. by kc.
He said my tuition useless also. cos i slp in class. nvr study.
Lols. i will larhs. and i hab norhs. den he say geri also same.
I was lyke nth t say. jus kept sayin she said she'll study.
She promised me. and we'll both study together. haish.
Kc made me think abt the future norhs. if now dunc study.
Nxt time how? we both how? still will be tgt anots.. worried.
Everything i'm doing now is worth it. its for you and me.
Its all good. i'm jus scared. feeling helpless sometimes.
I told u everything lerhs. now its only scared u wont study.
I hope u will norhs. tats the main thing. no prob lerhs.
The rest i've alrdy told u. i believe we've solved em. (=
I so need u. i really duno wat i'll do without u.
Maybe u wont see it. and havent seen me lookin down ovr u.
Feeling lost over u. even cry over you. hurhurs.
U havent seen all those. i nvr show them. i try t hide away.
But u still made me happy and feelin relieved after awhile.
If u jus walked away. what could i really say.
Would my words even matter anyway. would it change how u feel.
I'm the mess u chose. the closet u cannot close.
The devil in you i suppose.. cause ur wounds t never heal..
When its jus me and you. who noes wat we could do.
If we can jus make it through. the toughest part of the day.
We could Stay here tgt and we could conquer the world.
If we could say that forver is more than jus a word... <3

happy.

2006-07-10T19:07:00.000+08:00

Today was alil hectic. whole day was kinda tired and frust.
Didn felt too good. in heart and mind. lols.
I still pulled through. she made me felt better.
Thanks laopo. xp. always there when i need you.
U make me go crazy without seeing u for jus a day.
U make me need you all the time. hhhahs.
She bought me the necklace for our four months today.
Thanks alot! i love it. (= i'll get ur foundation soon.
This week we're meeting up t celebrate 4 months.
I promised her i would come out. i hope daddy lets.
Dunc worry, i'll persuade him until he lets me. heehs.
I'm loving u more and more with each passing day.
Makes me feel moody when ur unhappy or thinking.
I wished i could do something t cheer u up too. =/
For any reasons will do whenever u need me i'll be there.
I'll always stand by you and nvr leave ur side. Promised*
Iloveu sweetheart. this goes on and on and on..... neverending. <3

i'm happy i hope everythings fine.

2006-07-09T11:14:00.000+08:00

I hope things between us hasnt changed. last nyte was a lil madness again.
i'm sorry for causing all those misunderstandings when i can put them into
jus one sentence. i found it hard t say. beat around the bush and made it worst. =x
I'm sorry. sorry tat i keep apologising t you. if one day i could hab time alone
with you i would, pour my heart out and jus t let u noe exactly how i feel.
Let you noe my love is for real. Let u noe my worries. Let u noe my pain.
For everything i said and done. i hope i wont make u start t lose grasp.
I'll always be around with you. i'll be ryte by ur side whenever u need me.
Every conclusions i jumped t. it all made us quarrel. i'll change and noe reality.
What u said t me, i'll rmb everything. i cherish, i treasure. saying i love u.
I hope it wont turn out t be jus words without a meaning behind it. Thank you,
For understanding me. whenever my mind ran wild. but still i'll not let all tat
I did bring us down. i'll always get things back on track. i dunc wana hurt u,
No more. making u sadder each time. i feel lyke i'm always bringing u down.
When it was all so high up, i always bring us down so hard. i'm sorry.
I'll learn a past t be a past. nvr t talk abt it again, ever. i promise you.
I'll build up my confidence. i dunc wan u t change. because i really love u.
I care, alot most of the tymes. hope it isnt giving u stress. =x i hope its not
Too late. t still get things ryte. i always do this t you. no more. alrite. promise.
Ur stressed up too. i'll tell you everything tats left unsaid in my heart. someday..
When theres a chance. for us t be alone. at a place u imagined. tat u told me in.
In the bus, rmb? hhahs. building sandcastles. i'm happy t hab u around. i need u.
I'll always be sure tat u'll be aound. cos u said it all. (= i did reality check.
Yupps. i'm wrong t think this way. sorry. i'll always love u with no regrets. <3

i'm tired too.

2006-07-08T12:07:00.000+08:00

its been long since i last blogged. didn had the time. and was kinda lazy. i'm worried yarhs how can i not be. happy tat i cleared some doubts abt the past. well past is past. now i'm happy and glad. i still got yanyan with me. (= today i'll be stayin at home. studyin and maybe watch tv or play com barhs. tuition changed t tml noon. now i'm sitting here restless on the com for worrying too much. after tonite will be fine. i miss u darling. yesterday went with her t tampines t buy bread. lols. went t shop shop abit but bbt and drink coconut water. nice eh. remind me of me when i was in bangkok. always drinking it. lols. nice larhs. pure coconut water. i'm so worried for u dunc ask me not t stress can anot. aiyo. take good care of urself when i'm not around alrite. cos i'll be worried for ur safety 24/7 nonstop. tired of parents one ask too much. the other keeps showing temper over little little things. i feel so tense up being around them. wished u were here. always clearing my mind and cheer me up even in worst situations u always make me feel better. with u around theres nth i cant control except sometimes i lose my temper and threw them at u. i'm sorry. i'm learning t keep myself cool and control it. u taught me some. changed me alil. thanks. i've made up my mind on many things. and tot carefully on many things. many things were unexpected and it all started off so well. its not gona end. i hope. i love u. u made me view things in a diff way. u created a whole new part of me. a new chapter. a new beginning. a new meaning. <3

so long since i blogged.

2006-07-01T10:35:00.000+08:00

WAha. its been awhile since i blogged arhs.. was busy lately.. came home late every weekdays.
I want t accompany her i dunc wana go home so early too. exams coming also got study out.
I've cleared up every mess, well theres 1 more.. hhahs. hope it can be done as soon as possible.
Yesterday we talked like we were besties lols. its like bringing back sec 3 memories. hhahs.
Talked everything abt the past. felt happy sayin it out. we werent talking as steads.
I treat her both ways. so its kinda great. its so different t fall in love this way. not so tense too.
Well we're happy again. theres nothin more t think about. feeling better each day.
Hope i'll find myself like how i was in sec one again. I'm sure she'll be happier. hhahs. [:
HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY` thanks for understanding me. <3